Cellar Sheep

Chapter 6

Darkness. It was so dark in the stairwell yet I felt more comfort in it than any embrace. It welcomed me and I welcomed it back.

"Do you want to live?" It asked me. I nodded my head slowly.

"I do."

"I can help you live." It said. "I can help you survive."

"I want to survive," I told it.

"Then accept me."

"I accept you."

"Let me in control and no one can hurt you anymore. You will be free."

"But... I am free."

"Not from your past." It said, its voice soothing yet echoing in my head. "You're still hanging on but I can free you."

I racked my brain for whatever happened in my past that I was hanging on to. Something that was holding me back.

"I don't need to be freed."

I looked up to see my own face staring back. Eyes as dark as obsidian, teeth as sharp as razors, and a smile that could cut just as deeply.

"Then you don't want to live."

"But I do! I want to live and... and..." What was I living for again? Was there a reason?

It snatched my arm in its hand, revealing the multiple scars that covered it. I hissed in pain as it dragged a clawed finger up, the skin splitting and blood oozing down the side. I tried to pull away but it held firmly.

"You already tried to die, you don't want to live."

"Stop!" I cried, trying to pull away. "You're hurting me!"

"How did someone like you end up alive? Why wasn't it you? Why did it have to be her? Why did you let her die?"

"No! I didn't—"

"You killed her. You killed him." My reflection dragged its tongue along the cut, lapping up every drop of blood it could. "Let me win."

My eyes shot open, the only light was the small stream coming from the lobby doors. In front of my face was a small pool of black liquid, every once in a while a drop adding to it from above.

I pushed myself to my knees, everything aching but so far no sign of injury. I was covered in blood (not sure if it was mine or someone else's), a black liquid stained my hands and my clothes were torn to shreds again. But, no injury.

I shakily pushed to my feet, standing making the world spin. Small streams of light were visible and dust floated calmly. It was quiet. Too quiet. Only the sound of dripping and my own breathing.

And that itching.

I rubbed the back of my head, trying to get it to go away. But it only seemed stronger now and I didn't know what would satisfy it. It made me frustrated.

Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted something shiny. I walked over and picked it up, realizing that it was a ring. Not just any ring.

"Kenny," I whispered, tears forming in my eyes. 

"Go. Live."

I clutched the ring to my chest. Another person who I couldn't save; someone I got killed.

When will I stop owing?

I slid it onto my thumb since it was too big for my other fingers, making a silent promise to him. I don't know what's gonna happen next but I'm going to try my damn best to keep moving forward. To find my family, then my friends.