My Guardian Demon

Chapter 24 : Escape

In theory, the brain is only trying to ease the pain for the victim. Like if a little child goes through a traumatic event, then their brain deletes this event from their memory to protect their mental and psychologic health.

But this defense mechanism is only dangerous, it can make the victim not even realize the fact they're constantly facing a danger or the fact they're not even being happy or the fact they're constantly being hurt.

So that was it... Shuichi's true purpose...

This bastard of Shuichi...

He thought I was sleeping but I learnt how to pretend. I heard everything he said... Stockholm's syndrom... that was his true purpose...

(I'm sick of writing Stockholm)

Such a psychologic shock... such a manipulation... I had understood that Shuichi was far from being dumb but I didn't think he would be this clever and picky !

Every single of his sentences, every single of his words, even every single of his punctuation... manipulation.

The way he twists his actions into a caring and nice way, full of good intentions, of not taking accountance of his faults, even the worst ones... manipulation.

The way he always makes me feel guilty, scolds me, screams at me, associates my 'faults' to torture sessions... manipulation.

The way he treats me like a little child, a kid who can't do anything by themselves without his help... manipulation...

Yeah, even that... even treating me like a mere object with no feelings at all or desire of a consent to satisfy his sexual obsessions... and then, the next day, treating me like a little child who can't do anything without his help...

You know... well, I'm not saying that for you to use it in a bad way of course, but if you keep saying to someone that they're worthless, that they can't do anything right, that they're just a little child with a very angry tone... This person will end up believing what you said just because they would have heard these things several times... just because you would have traumatized them by telling them that... and they will lose the little self-esteem they had... and will not dare do anything else ever again just because they will think 'Why bother ? I can't do it anyway so...'

Shuichi... really is dangerous...

Good thing I didn't underestimate him... Good thing I didn't try to escape that day when he left the door unlocked or when he didn't tie me up...

I bet anything those were just tests or exams to make sure his manipulation was working well... and if I had failed at those tests... then... I would have suffered a punishment way worse than the basement... or just getting raped... or just a merge of everything he made me go through so far...

Good thing I waited a little longer... I knew he must have had something to watch over me whenever he leaves the house to know if I ever try to escape or if some robbers try to break in and find me... I was right...

But this time, it's for good... he finally got rid of that damn camera... I can do what I want and escape and he'll only realize this when it'll be too late, when the police will come to pick him up... this bastard...

When did it all begin ? When did I realize his true plan ? I'd say... around the time of my basement punishment...

With everything being silent around you, you cannot not think about anything, your mind must wander and think about something... In my case, that was what Shuichi had said to me countless times... I had heard these so many times that I couldn't think of anything else... exactly like he was hoping for, I bet...