This Love ✔️

This Feeling

Reluctantly Bash leans back until he's laying down beside me.

"Why am I doing this again?"

"Shh," I snap and place my fingers over his lips. "No talking yet."

He rolls his eye and I retract my hand.

Quietly I whisper, "Love hurts."

Bash groans and rolls his head so he's looking up at the stars. "Is this what this whole thing is about?" He turns back to look at me. "Some guy broke your heart?"

Tears sting my eyes and I shake my head, feeling my lower lip wobble.

"Don't you dare cry," he hisses. I'm shocked into silence by his cruelty. "I told you that love doesn't exist and you didn't believe me. So you can't come to me and start crying over some stupid guy who broke your heart."

"He is stupid," I admit, sobbing quietly. "He kissed me and he made me believe that he liked me!" I cover my face with my hands. The poison in my veins is making me lose all self-control. "Then he ignored me and went back to his perfect little girlfriend!"

The world is quiet around me, the only thing in the barren land is the sound of my sobbing. Bash was right when he said that no one would find us here. We drove a little less than an hour to a lake that was surrounded by a think army of trees.

"God, I'm so damn stupid."

Bash gently pulls my hands away from my face but I keep my eyes closed, not having the bravery to look him in the eye.

He was right when he told me that true love doesn't exist and virginity doesn't mean anything other than a trophy for a guy to win. And he was also completely right when he said that I'll get my heart broken one day.

Before I know what's going on his soft lips land on mine.

When he pulls away I look up at him shocked. "What was that for?"

He shrugs his shoulders carelessly as he hovers over me. "Your crying was bothering me."

"Thanks," I say blandly and push him away.

I snatch the bottle of vodka from behind his back and take four big gulps before he's pulling it away from me. "Watch yourself Sadie."

"No," I snap and yank the bottle from his hands again and take more sips. By the time I hand the bottle back to Bash I'm flying on cloud nine. My whole body feels better and lighter and I think someone painted a smile on my face.

Bash turns to me placing the bottle that he also just chugged from back on the grass by his side. "What are you laughing about?" His words come out a little bit more slurred and his eyes have darkened.

How long has he been drinking from the bottle and how long have I been touching my lips, giggling to myself?

"Michelangelo painted my smile," I laugh.

Bash looks at me intently. Slowly he cups my cheek into his hand. "Your smile," he slurs leaning in closer to me.

"Michel painted it for me. He loves me."

Bash bites his lips and says, "He painted all of you." His eyes rake up and down my body. "A masterpiece," he whispers huskily before his lips land on mine.

I expect him to be rough and fast like he usually is but instead his lips are slow and calculating. His hands slowly caress my cheeks and neck, my own hands grip his t-shirt in anticipation. I squirm under him, wanting more. More of him, so much more.

"Bash," I whine.

He swings on leg in between mine, pushing my thighs apart and slowly moves so he's lying directly above me.

His lips leave mine only to slowly trail down my neck and his hands leave my face to run over my bare stomach. When his lips reach the collar of my shirt he greedily reaches one hand around my back and unzips the zipper holding the cloth together. He practically tears the fabric from my skin.

His eyes darken even more as he looks at my naked chest.

Even in my drunken state I'm self-conscious of my breasts. They're not big, in any case but they're also not small either. I can fit my hand around them perfectly fine but with Bash's big hands? I don't think he would find them very attractive.

However Bash immediately lowers himself to ravish them. Hands, tongue, lips, all.

I'm gripping his hair and moaning uncontrollably. I want him, all of him now.

"Bash."

I'm entranced by the bulge of his pants pressing against my inner thigh. I've never touched one before, let alone seen one.

Taking control I flip us over so I'm straddling him and he's laying below me with a shocked expression. He helps me take off his shirt before I'm pushing him back down to the ground. I let the alcohol in my system take over and try to remember every séx scene I've watched. I make a trail of kisses from his neck down to the waistband of his jeans. I flick my tongue out into his pants and feel his shudder beneath me. Then I slowly, ever so slowly, retrace my path back up his body but with my tongue instead.

When I reach his lips again he's breathing heavily and he says, "Fuck Sadie, what the hell way that?"

I run my tongue over him bottom lip while I fumble with the button of his jeans. I reach into his boxers the same time I bite his bottom lip and pull.

He groans beneath me and squeezes the hold he has on my waist and chest. While I rub him with my hand and run my tongue on the inside of his mouth, I let myself grind against him every so often which causes him to moan my name quite loudly.

He grows tired of my slow pace and the fόréplay and in just a couple minutes he is laying directly above me, covered by thin rubber while neither of us have a scrap of clothing on.

He buries his head in the crook of my neck and groans my name.

"Please," I plead.

Suddenly he's in me. I scream out his name which only causes him to pull away and dive back in.

My drunken state helps the pain fade away faster because almost instantly I'm as eager as Bash himself who doesn't seem to be slowing down any time soon.

They will probably have to amputate my legs of tomorrow but that's totally okay. This is worth it.

...

As my memories come back to me I can't help but feel completely mortified. I lost my virginity last night. To Bash. In the woods. While I was drunk.

I speedily yank on my clothes and gasp in shock when I find my underwear ripped in two. Well then.

Embarrassed and not enjoying the sight, well actually enjoying it too much I gingerly cover Bash's back side up with his shirt.

'Good, now I won't be tempted,' I think as I sink back on to my heels and look off to the blue water.

"Sadie?"

Oh no.