Metanoia

~24~ Safe Travels

Since the break-in, my parents have been arguing a lot. At least this time Dexter and I knew what it was about. Who would've known Cathy and Kayden were related to a bipolar lady that shot my mother, while pregnant with me?

And Lilah, or should I say Delilah was my mom old roommate from college and basically made her life hell. Father also slept with her. I wasn't surprised. I'm still grossed that he would be that type of guy.

Makes me sick.

Speaking of father, mine was finally available to sit down in the attic and talk. While I outlined him and his signature pose on the canvas. He sat down with a powerful dynamic pose as if he was sitting In his office chair.

I ask him questions I always wanted to ask my father, besides his past mistakes. One being, "What did you want to do when you were younger?" I go over the outline of his eyes again. I find it crazy how I resemble him more than my mother now.

"I used to want to teach." He tells me with a smile.

"Teach?" I was taken back. "Teaching to a businessman. That's a huge leap."

"It wasn't what I attended trust me. It turned out to work just well. Thanks to the money your great grandfather left me."

Curiously, I tilted my head. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure." He replies.

"The money that I would've inherited from you. What are you going to do with it?"

"Nothing." He placed his head down. I haven't gotten that far yet. His sorrows had my eyes flowing with tears. I had asked him to give the money to the baby, I am sure whatever it is, will need it for college. He told me no and that they have plans for the baby already.

"The money is yours." He claims. "Whatever you want to do with it, is up to you."

I place the black colored pencil down and placed my hands on my knees. "I want to travel the world with Christian," I say truthfully. He looks up at me from the ground, certainly puzzled at my sudden choice of bold words. "it will only be for a few months and I promise I will check in all the time." I add. His silence was scary. It was like I can hear the 'no' coming from his mouth already. "I only have about eleven months to live now. I said bye to college and There's nothing for me to do here. I at least want to do doing something great. Like traveling with someone I love." I folded my hands, hoping for the best. "Please daddy. It would only make me happier."

Instead, he cried. He let the tears drip from his eyes with pride. Something told me he was holding something back and he doesn't want to let go. Something like me. "Dad." I got up from my stool and walked towards him. "Dad I promise you are still my number one. But you have to let me go eventually, if you don't, I'll die miserably." I joke.

He hadn't said anything, but I knew his answer. Standing up from his stool, he pulled me in for a hug. He kissed my forehead and held me tight. I could feel the drip of tears falling on me. "You mean a lot to me." He mumbled. "I don't want you to end up getting hurt like your mother was. I guess there's really nothing I can do to keep you from him." His huffing has me believing he is about to tell me "Yes."