What We Owe

Chapter Twenty One

I walked out of the bathroom and the music was pulsating, reverberating through my entire body. I made my way to the middle of the dance floor, not knowing what to do. I could see the front door. I looked back over to where we had been sitting, and I saw Stefan... with the waitress... on his lap.

She was laughing at something he was whispering in her ear. His gaze found mine, but he just looked back over to the beautiful brunette sitting on his lap.

I didn't want to cry. I didn't want to breath. I just put my head down and walked to the door. I felt a hand grab my arm and I turned to see Melanie. She was smiling but it disappeared as soon as she saw me. I was seconds away form breaking and I needed to get out of here.

"Claire," She started but I just yanked my arm away and ran to the door. Matteo stood at the door, eyes calculating when he saw me. I walked straight up to him and shoved the ring in his chest. He didn't move to grab it, just let it fall. I returned is icy stare for a minute, and then I walked out of the door, no one stopping me.

The two guards at the door didn't say anything to me as I stumbled onto the side walk. I looked down both ways, having no idea where to go. Our car... I mean Stefan's car, was sitting at the curb. I saw my reflection, not recognizing the girl staring back at me. The picture of the girl on Stefan's lap flashed through my mind and I started moving my feet, needing to be far away. I started running, heels slapping against the pavement.

I could hear sirens in the distance and I didn't know if I was running towards them, or away from them. I just ran. A few men whistled at me but I kept going, not having any destination in mind. I ran until I couldn't anymore. I fond an alley and I turned down it, back on the wall and crouched down. I held my face in my hands as I cried. A stupid, loud, wailing cry. I had spit falling from my lips but I didn't care. I knew people were passing me, some slowing to watch the girl in front of them break.

I waited for the breakdown to subside. There were times I thought it was done but it came back with a vengeance. When I had nothing left in me, I stood and started walking. I came to a convenience shop and walked in. I passed a man who help the door opened for me, looking me over.

The kid behind the counter was around nineteen and covered in acne. He looked over me, shaking his head.

"Sorry, we don't let drunk people buy anything here." He said. I wasn't in the mood to deal with this.

"I'm not drunk." My voice didn't sound like me. "Give me your phone, I need to make a call." He looked at me like I had just told him a joke.

"I swear to God I will cut off your fucking balls if you don't hand it over to me in two seconds." The humor vanished from his face and he fumbled in his pocket, handing me over his phone.

"Thank you." I said, my tone lighter but not as nice as I had intended. I felt bad for threatening the kid but not bad enough to apologize.

The line rang and Dex picked up.

"Dex, come get me." I said simply. "I'm at some store," I put my hand over the speaker, "What's the address?" I asked the kid.

"298 forty fifth street." He said. I repeated it back to Dex and hung up, not waiting to hear his response. I handed the kid his phone back and turned away from him. No one else was in the store. I walked over to a rack with hoodies on and and grabbed one, slinging it over my head. I picked out a pair of sunglasses, sliding them over my face in case my breakdown decided to return. I went over to a cooler, pulling out a bottle of wine and twisting the top off. I started drinking from the bottle and looked back over to him. He just stared at me, not saying anything.

Good.

I kept drinking as I walked up and down the isles, picking out snacks. I brought up an arm full of bags to buy. I picked out a lighter and motioned behind him to the selection of cigarettes. He opened to mouth to ask which one but I said, "Surprise me." Before he could.

Once everything I had picked out was sitting between us, he looked at me and shifted uncomfortably. I realized I had nothing to pay with. This night was so fucked up, I didn't even care about what I was going to do. I took another sip from the bottle and sighed.

"If I show you my tits, can I have this?" I asked, motioning over the counter full of crap. He nodded frantically. I pulled down my top and flashed him. His eyes on them even after I brought my top back up. He bagged up my snacks, looking at the bottle in my hand. I gave him a warning look. He handed me the bag and I walked out. I sat on the curb, pulling out a bag of chips and a cigarette. I ate, smoked, and drank while I waited. I fucking dared somebody to say something. I kept looking down the way I came, half expecting to see a tattooed asshole running towards me, but he didn't come.

A while later a car pulled up to the curb and Dex shot out of the passenger seat. He came to me and lifted me, hugging me into him tightly.

"Claire, oh my God!" He squeezed me and I took another swig from the bottle over his shoulder. He pulled me back and cradled my hands in his face. It didn't feel right, especially with Stefan being the last person to do it.

"I want to go home." I said. Dex nodded. He thought I meant Chicago, but I didn't. I slid into the back seat and he shut the door, sliding in right next to me.

"Airport, Marco." He said. The car pulled away and drove in the direction of the club. When we approaching, I downed the rest of the bottle, feeling Dex's stare on me. I dropped the bottle to the floor and pulled Dex into me, kissing him. He fell on top of me, my back sliding down the leather of the seat. I didn't care that Marco was inches away, I just needed to feel something other than the gaping hole expanding in my chest.

I let him touch me everywhere he wanted. He pulled and nipped at me, I responded robotically, letting him take control and followed his prompts. He pulled away, hand still on my face and looked at me. He rested our heads together and let out a small laugh.

"I've missed you." He whispered.

"I'm all yours." I said back. He smiled, not hearing the heartbreak in my voice. He was good at that, only hearing and seeing what he wanted.

I let out a quiet bitter laugh as we approached the airport entrance. Dex had been what I deserved after all. I had spent so much time worrying about trapping him with me, not realizing there was a Claire that existed that lit up under a tattooed had and devouring lips.

Dex pulled me out by my hand. I left the rest of my snacks in the car, not caring about them or anything else. He bought us two one-way tickets to Chicago.

By the time we boarded the plane, I was drunk. I had been tipsy before but now I was fully intoxicated. I leaned my head back on the seat and closed my eyes. Dex thought I was overcome with relief. He squeeze my knee.

'Don't worry, you're free, Claire."

"I know." I said back, and that was the problem.