History, Loyalty & Levi || Book 3: Love, Lies & Levi

Chapter 13: Ava...

"Fuck you Athen!"She shouted at him.

"Ava! What are you doing?!" You were now next to them both, pulling Athen closer to you.

"(Y/n), your brother is a fucking ass hole." Her eyes began to weld with tears and you turned to him but before you could say anything or ask any questions, he shook himself out of your grasp and walked away.

"Bitch." You heard him say under his breath.

"Ava what the hell is going on with you!?" You asked turning back to her. "Why the fuck did you slap him in the face?"

"Because your brother is a fucking asshole (Y/n)!" She shouted again.

"Elaborate dumb ass! I know he's an asshole sometimes." You snapped back at her. She sighed out in annoyance and ran a hand through her hair.

You knew Athen could be too much sometimes and can overall just be a dick... but seeing her slap him like that, triggered some sort of rage inside of you.

"He said if I don't choose by the weekend he's going to go sleep back with some bitch he was with before." She huffed out.

You rolled your eyes a bit.

Was she serious?

"Well, Ava..." you sat next to her now. "You are sleeping with him and Ekho at the same time, do you really think you have any right to be that mad about him giving you this ultimatum?" She rolled her eyes at you.

"It's not that... I just..." you could hear in her voice the pain and confusion. "This is just too much for me."

"Ekho and Athen?" You asked, wrapping an arm over her shoulder and she sunk into it.

"No... well yes. But just all of this. I feel like... I'm just sleeping around because I'm scared of dying alone." She said, and a tear now rolled down the side of her cheek.

"What do you mean? We always had a feeling we could die on expeditions."

She shook her head. "No, no." She looked up at you, tears uncontrollably falling down her cheeks. "These past expeditions and missions and... and plans. It's the first time I believe I'm not going to make it out alive." You wiped at her tears, your lips now quivering a little.

"I know." You admitted and nodded taking her in your embrace. "I know exactly what you mean."

It's true, before the expeditions all felt... survivable, but recently with all these new things going on like the titan shifters and now Kenny too. It just is starting to look less and less survivable.

"What has happened?... I thought I'd never say this, but I miss just killing titans and that's it." She scoffed out, shaking her head a bit.

"I know, Ava. But, look at it this way... Yeah, things seem to be harder than before, but everytime it gets harder, we're one step closer to finding the truth behind all of this. Which means we can end this all."

Ava had every right to feel the way she did. The confusion, the frustration, the loneliness... all of it was valid. The only reason you're keeping yourself up these days is because of Levi... but like she said, she doesn't feel like she has that.

"I want what you have." She said softly, looking down at her feet.

"W-what?"

"Love, I want to love someone as much as you love Levi." She wiped at a tear. "I want someone to hold me at night, that isn't just some random hookup... I want someone to motivate me to survive when I'm out there. Someone who will give me a reason to come back." Your heart began to break.