TWs- Self harm, blood, negative thoughts, emotional abuse
~~~~
George's P.O.V
Tomorrow was monday. Another week, of that school, another week of the dark that consumes me. Today is hard, so so hard. Sitting down on my floor, I stare into the mirror in front of me. My eyes are more sunken in, more dark, my skin has gotten so pale, ghost like.
I reminisce the weekends I'd spend with my parents, stupid birthday. This one time, my mom took us to the beach, it felt so warm on my olive colored skin. The ocean breeze drifted through the fluffy, dark hair.
But now, I feel nothing. I haven't been to the beach since that day, I don't think I'll ever go back.
The overwhelming feeling of guilt and sorrow drowns me yet again, except this time its harder to fight.
•TW- Self harm•
My eyes drift over to the small box that lays under my bed, I reach for it. Inside I see my razor blade, a few cigarettes, and a ting baby blue lighter. My shaky hand picks out the blade, it looks so sharp today.
I roll up my sweatshirt, bringing the blade to my wrist. My eyes shut tightly as I bring the blade down, once, twice... eventually 10 times. My wrist burns, but I can't feel it anymore. I've gotten so used to it, so used to the sweet feeling.
•TW over•
I push my sleeve back down and go to the bathroom to clean up. I look into the mirror in the bathroom, why couldn't it have been me?
My eyes shift away as I leave the bathroom, returning back into my dark room. Laying down on the hard mattress, sleep doesn't find me easy, it never does.
~~~~
"George?" my eyes fly open, yet they feel hazy and blurry, is this a dream?
"George honey..." mom? I recognize that voice so easily...
I look towards my left, I see my parents. Except this time blood covers their shirts, and their eyes are dead, just like them. Is this some type of sick joke? George tears his eyes away from his parents, he sees his uncle now.
"Its all your fault, you're so pathetic! You just had to get your stupid ass gift huh?!" I flinch away, he words make my blood cold.
"It-Its not my fault.. I didn't know.. That-that they w-would-"
"Of course its your fault! It always will be! You were the reason they were their that day! It should've been you George!"
My uncle's words are surrounding me, I scream out, "WAKE UP GODDAMNIT, PLEASE"
My eyes open for the second time, except this time its not a dream. My breathing is heavy, and my chest hurts. Salty tears run down my face, I use my hands to wipe them away but I can't keep up. It is my fault, it should've been me!
That night, I cry myself to sleep.
~~~~
Hey guys, shorter chapter, but I promise the next one will be longer! comment & vote! <3
YOU ARE READING
My Loverman // Dreamnotfound
Teen Fiction[ ON HOLD ] TWs: suicidal thoughts & actions, self harm, cursing, emotional & physical abuse, mature themes - chapters will have TWs with them. George is lost, mentally. After the death of his parents, he was forced to live with his abusive Uncle wh...
