Piece Of Heaven

6. Bittersweet

The way back to the dorm after buying breakfast was a slow one. The joy and excitement were missing in his steps. The feelings that were squeezing his heart were longing and sadness. Kongpob knew he was being silly, that he should be grateful for the unexpected three days he got to spend with his boyfriend. Still, he couldn't help the feeling of despair creeping in. Kicking stray stones on the street, he treaded back sluggishly, knowing that the hour of separation is inching closer slowly.

The last two days have been heavenly. Together they discovered so much about each other. So many barriers were breached; walls were broken. He learned about his lover's naughty childhood, his confusing teens, and experiences that made Arthit who he is today. He felt he could spend an eternity listening to Arthit and getting to know him. He could spend days just looking at his lover. But their reality was something else. 

Today, sadly, they had to part ways until the beginning of their next term. It would be the longest they would stay apart, and that gave a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. It felt wrong to him. It felt unfair. Just when they were getting closer, they would part ways. And he knew that Arthit would once again pull back into his shell during their time apart, and that worried him. Would they be able to go back to being this close?

What he experienced in the last two days was ecstasy beyond his wildest imagination.

Like every average teen, he too was introduced to the magic of the opposite sex and sexuality through peers and media. After assuaging his natural curiosity through video, articles, and discussion among friends, he had put these thoughts on the back burner. It was his education and career he wanted to focus on.

He was always clear about his goals in life. He knew as the son of an affluent family, he had certain responsibilities that he needed to fulfill, for which he had to study hard and focus on building his career. He grew up in a healthy household where love, understanding, and respect were paramount. So Kongpob never found the reason to act out or be rebellious. 

His family had instilled values in him that had shaped him to grow into this fine young man that he was today. Growing up with strong ladies taught him all about respecting and treating women right, and seeing his parents and sibling's overall behavior, he learned how important it was to treat everyone courteously and equally, so he never aspired to be a playboy/lover boy even though opportunities were galore. He had his desire and adventurous side in check, and with clear goals and plans, he had applied himself to academics and thought love could wait.

So, when feelings for Arthit arose, he was gobsmacked. Never in his wildest dreams had he thought that he would so quickly be attracted to someone, let alone a boy. Yet he found himself freefalling in love as he got to know Arthit more and more. And to have Arthit accept that love was an even bigger blessing in his eyes. 

All the love and desire that bubbled up for Arthit within him was like a gale that rocked his being. He had no clue when he had become like those horny teenagers around Arthit. He had this constant desire to touch and hold his lover. He wanted to kiss his pouty lips and hold his slender body in his arms. And now that he had got the taste of heaven, he wanted more and more. When did he change this much, he wondered?

And now, this long separation was bothering him. Would Arthit be the same? What if he changed during these holidays? What if he realized being with a guy was not worth it? With all these doubts gnawing, he slowly made his way into the room to see Arthit still asleep, his angelic face, relaxed in deep slumber with no worries. He sat looking at his face, worrying about their future. When the fear was too much to handle, he slipped in next to and pulled him closer.

Sensing his lover closer, in his sleepy state, he put his arms around Kongpob's waist and pulled him closer to him, burying his face in his neck, inhaling deeply. He liked it. Warmth spread through him as he felt Kongpob's body heat radiating, unaware of his inner turmoil.