Codex Mortem

Cold my heart

Today I had this strange feeling. Something was not right. The nature was silent. Too silent.

I hurried inside and hid the few things Dawn possessed in a masked hole under the ground. I thanked the Sun for her absence.
She always was outdoors looking for plants, climbing trees to gather eggs or checking snares. And I always scolded her for that.

The door opened, and his shadow filled the room. In a blink, I knew who it was.

My heart was galloping like a crazed stallion, and I struggled for air like a fish out of water. I swallowed dry and closed my eyes, regaining the self-control I needed.

"Hello Illre." I filled the mug and invited him at the table. I sat opposite.

"Endrine..."

In this hard life, we must keep the few good memories we have. He once filled my dreams, he once was my lover. But when those memories are covered in innocent blood, it taints your soul.

I looked into his eyes and I saw a different man. A killer. A beast.

"We change, Illre, life changes us all... Leave and never come back!"

After our brief exchange of words, I left the mug down and went to stir the fire.

Of course, he wanted to know how I survived the werewolf's bite, and he was after the code. With those, the balance of the world would chance.

He came close, and I readied myself to pull the small blade from my belt. He turned and left. The nerves and emotions were dancing in my spine. I knew he won't quit so easily.

There was no point in moving again, there was nowhere else to go. As I was thinking about what to do, my sweet baby stepped in.

"Blessings, mother!" She smiled at me and grabbed the mug. This is cold, she said, lifting the brew to her lips.

Realization poured over me and I jumped from my spot to kick the drink away, but it was too late. She already took a gulp. I caught her in her fall and sat us on the floor.

Tears flooded as I looked into her cold, still eyes.

My beautiful Dawn stepped into the afterlife.

.....

My eyes burned, but they had no more tears left. I closed them for a moment and imagined her genuine smile. A smile I will never see again, I thought, while my numb hands braided her rich hair for the last time. I twisted the braid and gathered it on the top of her head, leaving her shorter strands to frame her high-boned cheeks.

I took the white lace veil and carefully tied it around the bun with the rest of it loose on her back and front to cover her angelic face, resembling the bride she never was.
She was gone too soon from this world, and she took with her the light from my heart.

I looked at her calm face. That face that will never look at me again to make my days shine.

Small hands will never hold mine, nor I will ever hear "I love you, mother".

Lighting another candle for her path to be bright, I hid the only coin I owned in the hem of her long sleeve. She had her good dress on, with the star chain underneath her covered cleavage.

With respect for the old rites, I stood vigil at her side till the sun rose, chanting for her soul. She looked so peaceful, like she was asleep.

In the morning I carried her deep in the forest, where she always loved to be.

When my shovel broke, I dug with my hands. I cared not for bleeding broken nails; I cared for nothing else in that moment. My life was empty, meaningless.

Placing her slowly in the cold grave, surrounded by evergreen small brunches, I sat solemn and ready to give my last prayer.

I lift my arms to the sky, begging the Sun to listen to my cry, and my mouth opened to say the plea.

Suddenly, a twig broke, and I knew I wasn't alone anymore.

Werewolves surrounded me and I fell to my knees, begging them to let me finish. All I had left to do was to cover my sweet baby with the ground's blanket, to keep her warm and make her one with the nature.

But they didn't care about insignificant lowers. They tied my wrists and dragged me away like a heavy sack, so full of them- they caught a New Dawner.

There was only one way they could've known where to find me: Illre.

He wanted me dead, but was too coward. For that, he used the poison. For sure he left a trail for the predators, because is easier to have others to do your dirty task. Too bad I will not have the chance to show him how revenge should be served.

All I could hope is that the Sun and the Moon will hear my sorrow and serve him what he truly deserve.

.....