If Only I Knew

CHAPTER II

He immediately read the looks on our face when he asked "What's wrong? Brooklyn? Samuel? Did something happen?"

"Samuel, go to your room and change for lunch."

Sam refused to look his father in the eye and quietly went to his room. Noah gave me a questionable look and I couldn't hold back anymore.

"Why did you hide the fact that he got into a fight at school from me?"

"Oh, that umm... that's not a big deal. I didn't want to stress you with such menial matters."

"He's my son! I deserve to know whatever is happening in his life and you trying to hide it from me isn't really helping me in that. Don't you realise that this is a wake-up call for us both?"

"Brooke, I don't understand what you're saying."

"Are you freaking blind, Noah? I guess everybody is able to see and understand what is going on! We need to fix our relationship before we hurt Sam more." I was almost in tears as i said these words.

"Brooke, this is a relationship not a goddamn machine that we'll get it fixed! And no there's no need to 'fix' anything. We're good."

"Oh yeah? Do you really think so? After coming back from Bali did we go for any weekends dinner? Did we sit down together for a meal even once? And this all is affecting Sam." I was refraining from being too loud lest Sam heard us fighting again this time.

"You're right! You're totally right that we didn't have a meal together as a family even once after we came back. Do you know why? Because of you!"

I was stunned at his words. He didn't care and continued speaking "You were busy with your own fictional characters because you still haven't forgotten him. And yes, our relationship is on the verge of breaking because you can't forget him completely! You know that this is the truth and you're too afraid to accept it. So stop blaming me as if it were all my fault."

I stood there like a statue. I didn't even bother to reply and simply walked to my room amd locked myself. Maybe because a tiny part inside of me knew that maybe Noah was right. I hadn't truly forgotten Will. I just pretended to do so and it worked out well for me so far.

I sat down on the floor, my back in alignment with the edge of the bed. I didn't even realise when tears started falling off my eyes. All I could think about was Noah's painful words. "You still haven't forgotten about him!"

Was it all just my mistake? I didn't know the answer to that but I did know that whatever it was, I needed to fix it. Not for myself, not for Noah, but for Sam.

I still remember the moment when I held him for the first time. The feeling was exquisite and I would go through the pain each time if I were to feel such respite that I did at that moment. That day I swore to myself that I would never be like my own parents.

My world changed thereafter. I didn't even realise when this tiny human being became the centre of my universe! I remember when he called me 'Mom' for the first time. Seeing him smile is the bestest thing in the world.

I got up and wiped the tears from my face. When I went to Sam's room, I found him lying down on his bed. At first I thought he was sleeping but later I could hear the sound of soft sobbing. No! What am I doing? I was probably a worse parent than my own! I sat down on his bed and he sensed it and immediately jumped up and hugged me.

"Momm... I don't like to see you and Daddy fight like that. Please don't do that ever again." He continued to cry while speaking and I could feel the exact emotions that I had felt when I was his age. The same emotions when my parents fought because they couldn't save their own marriage.

We stayed like that for a moment. "I'm sorry, Sam. I swear Mommy and Daddy are not going to fight like this ever!" I stayed with him until he fell asleep. Then I tucked him back into his bed and carefully tip-toed out his room.

I went to the kitchen to drink a glass of water when I got a call from Sarah. Against my will I picked up her call.

"Hey Sarah."

"Brooke, I have called to let you know that you have to go to Michigan this weekend for another event! You wanted to more of these events, right? Isn't this great news?"

Of course, I wanted to do more of these events but not at the cost of my family, if I could still call it that. Most importantly, not at the cost of my son.

"Sarah, I'd like to cancel all my events for this weekend since I shall be spending some quality time with my family." I could imagine the huge smile on Sam's face when he was going to hear this news.

"Are you nuts? Brooke we're talking about big brands here. They....." I cut her off before she could finish her sentence.

"I meant it when I said it." I asserted myself.

"Okay Boss!" Sarah said with a sigh of defeat.

It felt like things were suddenly starting to fall back into place.

I frantically looked around for Noah to tell him about this arrangement but he was nowhere to be found. I even searched for him in the balcony and our room. I sat down on the couch and found a note on the table. It read:

"I'll be back by dinner. I have already prepared lunch for you."

I knew he didn't have lunch himself because he wanted it to be a family meal. Oh God! I felt guilty and I knew I had to make up to him. But how?

"Mom?"

"Samuel, You're supposed to be takong your afternoon nap!"

"I couldn't sleep." He pushed his lower lip out and looked completely adorable.

"Besides I thought I could help you with the problem that you have."

He pointed towards the note that I held in my hands and he wore one of his mischievous smiles. How much I love this boy!

Author's Note:

Hii!!! How are you all? Did you like this chapter? Do vote, comment amd share this with your friends and family!!

Love u loads♡