how it feels to be alive {tom riddle}

fifty-three: reparations

Lucia nodded lightly, stealing a glance at Tom, who had not altered his expression. His jaw was clenched tightly though, and she could tell this was difficult for him.

"Mr. Rosier, you would be wise to consider your actions more carefully in the future. I'm not sure that with another event such as this you will be able to return to this school." McGonagall turned her attention to Tom, "You will of course will be serving detention for the remainder of the term, and we shall organise an opportunity for an extensive and genuine apology as well as any further reparations at a later date."

"Of course, Professor." Tom agreed with that same controlled tone, he seemed to almost be resisting using his manipulation skills to get himself out of the situation.

"You may go, but Miss Cohen, I wonder if you may stay for just a moment." The Headmistress requested.

Tom gave a curt nod, and rose from his seat to exit the office. Soon, his footsteps had faded away from down the stairs.

"Miss Cohen, I urge you to deeply consider the choices you make for those you surround yourself with." McGonagall advised, her eyes stern but with good intentions. The professor stole a look at the portrait of the previous Headmaster, who was looking intently down the bridge of his nose over his moon-shaped spectacles.

Lucia looked between the two, nodding slightly.

McGonagall took a breath, "I must ask, has Mr. Rosier ever..."

"Oh my God, no he has never hurt me. Thank you for your concern Professor, but no definitely not. He isn't like that, and I would never put up with it if he was." Lucia defended in slight shock from the question.

"Forgive me for my concern, but as I believe you may have observed, Mr. Rosier is more complex than one might see at first glance." McGonagall's words seemed to have another layer that Lucia couldn't quite decipher.

Had she made any comments about Tom's origin or identity in their argument? She thought back hard, but the whole conversation had been a blur of strong emotion.

"I best be going now Professor." Lucia forced a closed lip smile m, beginning to turn towards the door.

"And Miss Cohen?" McGonagall called after her, causing her to turn back around to look at her Headmistress once more. "I am not ignorant to what occurs in my school, keep the sneaking into each other's dorms to the minimum."

Lucia's eyes went wide, having now expected such a comment. She gave a sharp nod before walking back towards the door of the office, and down the winding staircase.

When Lucia emerged from the office, she found Tom leaning against the wall opposite the entrance. He looked up when she stopped in front of him, trying to gage her emotions.

"I'm really fucking angry at you right now." Lucia confirmed, crossing her arms and not moving from her spot a couple of metres away from him.

"I can see that." Tom huffed, pushing himself off the wall and approaching her.

"Don't get any ideas, you can't just make it up to me through sex." She informed him as he closed most of the space between them.

"I know." He looked down at her, reaching up to brush a stray lock of hair from her face.

"You shouldn't have fucking done that to him Tom." She mumbled, looking down at her feet through the space between their bodies.

"What did he say when you visited him?" Tom asked out of curiosity, reaching down to tilt her chin up towards him.

"I'm sure you can imagine, you know him well enough by now." Lucia chuckled, running her tongue over her teeth.

"Should have let him die." Tom said dryly.

Lucia gave him a light slap on the chest, "Read the room."

"You know empathy isn't my strong point." Tom stated the obvious with a smirk.

Lucia rolled her eyes at him, and he brought his hands up to cup her cheeks softly.

"Tom, stop." She fought the urge to accept his affection, so she stepped back causing his hands to drop to his sides.

"Why do you care about him?" Tom genuinely asked.

"I don't, Tom, I really don't." Lucia sighed, shaking her head, "I know he's an absolute dick, like a total cunt... but he has been through so much shit."

"That is no excuse, everyone goes through shit. He relentlessly shames you in such an immature way, even his friends don't seem to like him." Tom reasoned.

"I know, I just can't help but feel kind of sorry for him. I've known him for so much longer than you have, I'm not just going to watch you kill him. Think about what would have happened to you if he died." Lucia explained.

"So you're not..."

"If you dare fucking ask me if I'm still seeing him I'm going to walk away." Lucia said sternly, "Do you really think my standards are that low, or that I would do that to you?"

"I suppose we never really discussed if we were exclusive... or what we even are." Tom raised.

"Are you sleeping with other people?" Lucia quirked an eyebrow.

"Definitely not." Tom's lips turned up at the sides into a smirk.

"I suppose we never really did discuss labels officially. It just has never felt like an important thing." Lucia thought out loud.

"So you don't want me to get out of your life then?" Tom asked with a hint of hopefulness in his eyes.

"As much as I don't agree with what you did, especially the part where you almost killed him... I know he was really pushing it, and he definitely didn't know who he was dealing with." She pushed to take a breath "But Tom, I don't need you to fight my battles for me. I appreciate you defending me, but I deal with this stuff all the time."

"You shouldn't have to." Tom was drawing closer again.

"You underestimate my resilience." Lucia chuckled.

"I'm really sorry for the distress I caused you today." Tom managed to say, a more meaningful repeat of his defeated apology hours before. This time he really did mean it.

Lucia knew just how difficult this kind of human decency was for him, so it meant a lot to hear him apologise without it being forced out.

"Thank you." Lucia gave a small smile.

"Are we okay?" Tom asked, and his hand twitched as if he wanted to reach out to touch her somehow.

Lucia sighed, "Yes."

He let his impulses take control and brought his hands to her cheeks once again. He pressed a light kiss on her lips, which she smiled into without even thinking.

author's note

It is still so weird to me that you guys actually read my writing, like when I look at the comments I don't think it really sinks in that people actually enjoy it like wtf

also don't forget to read my new one shots book. I wouldn't usually let someone cum on my face (bc if u get it in ur eye that shit hurts) but I want tom riddle to, and from the comments I get on this fic I think you do too. feel free to experience it through writing in the first short story. if smut isn't your thing though there is storyline beforehand anyway <3

also I added asterisks next to the smut chapters in this story because I can tell people go back to them or just straight up skip through to get to them lmao you're welcome