To Have, To Hold, and To Leave: A Bryce Hall FanFiction «completed»

6

I knew that I should start researching some divorce lawyers, but the only thing that I wanted to do was curl up in my bed and cry. I was broken.
My phone rang with a FaceTime. Shit. Griffin still kept in contact regularly, and it was time for our weekly call. I wiped the tears from my face quickly, hoping that he wouldn't notice. "Hey, Griff."
"Hey, Kate! How are my little nephews and niece?" 
"They're doing really good, Griff. They miss you. Isaiah keeps asking me if you're coming out for Christmas," I answered. 
"That's definitely something that I'm considering. I miss all of you guys," he replied. "Hey, quick question: not that it isn't lovely to talk to you, is Bryce home? I've been calling him, and he hasn't answered." 
Shit. "Um, Bryce doesn't really live here right now," I explained briefly. 
"Oh, is he like on a business trip or something?" Griffin asked. He had set his phone up on the counter, so it was unlikely that he saw my face fall. 
"Griffin, we are, um, we're getting a divorce," I muttered. 

Griffin whipped his head around, staring at me like I had three heads. "What do you mean you guys are getting a divorce?" 
"I mean, Bryce told me yesterday that he wanted a divorce."
"Let me talk to him," Griffin suggested. 
I sighed. "No. Do not do that. He's still a good man, and I will always love him for giving me the three best little blessings, but we just aren't in love anymore. I get it, and it's okay."
"You guys were always the best thing. You were the first to get married, and we all looked up to you guys for it. You guys have always been meant to be. You cannot give up that easily," Griffin complained. 
"Yes, I can actually. I can always give up that easily. We made a mutual decision to give up, Griffin. Don't let it stress you out. Was there something that you needed from Bryce?"
"Addison and I have been talking again, and I wanted to ask him his opinion on whether or not we should try getting back together."
My face told him that that was a horrible idea, but Griffin didn't bother asking questions. "Got it. you think that it's a bad idea. Okay. I love you guys. Keep me updated on the whole divorce thing, okay?"

He hung up, and I laid back down, looking over at the clock. Bryce would be back with the kids soon, and I needed to get it together. I couldn't have a breakdown about this in front of the kids. If I cried, they certainly would, too. 
I washed my face, and every trace of the disaster that I had gone through all day disappeared from my face. My entire life had changed in a split second with just a few words. 
I went back downstairs, and I sat on the couch, waiting for Bryce to come back with our kids. 

Almost as soon as my body hit the couch, the front door opened, and Bryce corralled all three kids onto the floor in front of the couch. He sat down next to me, squeezing my knee reassuringly. The fact that this was the last time that we would sit in front of our kids as a happy couple made my heart shatter. 
Staring at those three, innocent faces gave me flashbacks to the day that my parents had told us about their own divorce. 
I found myself uttering the same sentences. "This is about Daddy and me. We both love you very much. This doesn't change how much we love each of you, okay?"
Bryce hugged each of them tightly. "Alright, guys. Daddy is going to stay somewhere else for the time being. I will see you guys probably tomorrow okay. Be good for Mommy."

I got up to make dinner, and Bryce met me in the kitchen. "I understand that things are not good between us-"
I interrupted. "You cheated on me, Bryce. Obviously, things are not going to be good for us anymore."
"Anyway," he sighed, ignoring what I had said, "if you need anything, please call me. I'm still here for you. Hug the kids a little bit tighter for me at bedtime, okay?"

I allowed him to show himself out, and I sat down on the floor against the stove. I really, really needed to pull myself back together. If not for me, I needed to do it for my children. They came first, and I needed to remind myself of that. 
I got up off of the floor, pulling ingredients out of the fridge. I put a quick dinner together, calling the kids into the kitchen. 
They each sat down at their typical spots at the table, and we all just looked at Bryce's empty chair. I knew exactly what they were thinking. When I was in their position, I was thinking the exact same thing. It would take some getting used to, but I had raised unbelievably strong children, and I knew that they could get through this. Besides that, I knew that things were going to be different with Bryce and me. I wouldn't let it destroy our children. I couldn't. 

We ate in silence, and I held it together surprisingly well. I was determined to have it completely back together the next day, whether I liked it or not. I had kids. I didn't have time to make it about me. 
Nessa called me, and I left the table to answer it. "Hey, Ness. What's up?"
"I talked to Josh, who just talked to Bryce. You guys went through with it for sure? Like, you told the kids?" she asked. 
I nodded, chuckling softly at myself when I realized that she couldn't actually see me. "Sorry, I just nodded like you were standing in front of me or something."
"Oh, honey. Do you need anything?" she asked. 
"No, honey. I'm okay. The kids seem to have taken it pretty well. Don't worry about me," I assured her before hanging up and going back to the table. This was going to be fine; I was sure of it.