Something Precious {H.S.}

17: ᴋɪʟʟ ʟᴀ ᴋɪʟʟ

As a swarm of nurses prep me, I rub my stomach in soothing circles. "Are you excited to see your sister? I know I am. I can't wait for you two to be together with me, but don't you dare come out yet missy. Your sister just had to be the rebel, huh?" I smile to myself when she gently kicks against my hand. This is the first time I've been in a good mood all week.

"Okay hon, you ready?" I nod eagerly at Samira.

"Alright ladies, nice and easy, okay? Take it slow! When we get to the bump in the hall, we're going to have to go extra slow until we're over it. Got it?" Everyone nods and murmurs their agreements.

Then we're moving.

We're moving kind of slow, but my excitement overshadows that. I take in the hospital scenery, just happy to finally be out of my room. There's not much to see, but a few other patients wave at me. I just shrug and wave back at them.

We're almost to the elevator now, we just have to pass over this speed bump that runs in the middle of the hallway. The nurses go as slowly as they can, but I get bumped and my monitor starts going crazy. I feel slight pain but I'm willing to keep going. They however, are not.

"Back to the room, now!" They race me back to my room as my crestfallen face is buried in my hands.

In my room, they all work on me as they try to get me back into position. When me and the baby are stable, a few of them apologize as they leave. I don't uncover my eyes.

"Ellie, hon?" Samira's voice is extremely gentle and that's all it takes for the dam to break.

I haven't cried since everything happened, but it's all coming out now. Samira wraps her arms around me as best as she can as I sob and wail in her arms.

"Alright hon, let it out, it's okay." That just makes me cry harder.

"Why is this happening to me? I-I just w-want to see my b-baby! What if she dies? What if she dies and I'm not there?! She'll be all alone!" I start to hyperventilate, my chest constricting like it did that day.

Samira pulls back abruptly and grabs me by the shoulders. My eyes are full of panic, but hers are filled with determination. "Calm down hon, take a deep breath okay? Breathe with me, follow me. In, out, in, out- good Ellie, keep going."

The breathing works as my chest slowly expands, that tight feeling going away. When I'm completely calm again, Samira holds her hand out.

"What?"

"Give me your phone, hon."

I look at her in confusion. "What, why?"

"I know you don't want tell anyone, Ellie, but you cannot keep doing this alone. You need someone to be there for you and to support you."

She's right. I know she's right, but who the hell would I even call? Nobody knows that I'm in the hospital. Nobody knows that I had one of the babies. I texted Daria briefly and told her that I was on vacation. She's staying at her friend, Simone's house. She knows it's bullshit, but she doesn't have a choice but to believe me right now.

I know it's wrong, but I just couldn't bring myself to tell her. To tell anyone. I mean, what the hell would I even say? 'Oh hey, I went into early labor and endangered my babies lives because I saw their dead father with another bitch'?