Blue's Interviews, Season Two!

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*ad lib clapping* 

Bluestar: Thank you, thank you. Welcome to Season 2 of Blue 's Interviews! Today we'll start with Breezepelt.

Breezepelt: W-why am I here?

Bluestar: So, Breezepelt, how does it feel to be the son of a stupid, lying, heart-crushing, no good, mangy Windclan fleabag?

Breezepelt: *cricketcricketcricket*

Firestar: -whisper- Still half off combo meal at Tall Taco!

Bluestar: ..... Well, you can go now Breezepelt. Next, we have...Leafpool!!!

*Breezepelt runs out, screeching*

Leafpool: .n.

Bluestar: hello Leafpool. How's your life?

Leafpool: OMG it sucks! My mentor magically came back to life,mydaughterdied,myexhusbandsnewsonisevil,istoppedbeingamedicinecat,MydaddiedlikeomgandNOONEunderstandssoifeelaloneandstupidlikeomgBluestaricantbeawarriorbecauseisuckandifeelsadandmadand...BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH

Bluestar: So everything is grand! Next, how's your dad doing?

Leafpool: ;-; WAHHEHHAHEHWAHWAHHAHAH (crying noises •3•)

Bluestar: okay then. Bye Leafpool!

*Squirrelflight drags Leafpool off*

Bluestar: Now we have Swiftpaw back again!

*Bramblestar comes on and whispers something to Bluestar*

Bluestar: it appears Swiftpaw has mysteriously dissapeared! I guess we'll interview Heavystep now.

*Heavystep walks on with bloodshot eyes*

Bluestar: So, how's life for you, Heavystep?

Heavystep: MY LIFE IS A LIE!

Bluestar: okayyyy then. Commercial Break!

Starclan Donuts: You'll flip for our creamy fried dough! 

*Scourge does a flip*

Is your life a lie? Were you in the allegiances for a whole series longer than you should've been? Then call Heavystep's Therapy. We can help you follow your dreams, even though you died and lived longer than you should have. 

Call 1-800-INO-LIFE now! 

You'll even get a free mouse blood soap bar! (Sponsored by Scourge's Soaps "We're Kept Alive By Fangirls!")

Bluestar: And we're back, with Blossomkit of Shadowclan! So what's up with you?

Blossomkit: ........

Sandstorm: IS IT MY TURN YET?

Blossomkit: *turns to Sandstorm* 

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy,

Sandstorm: Heck yeah it is.

Bluestar: You both can leave now. Boy, this show just seems like dejavu...

Bluestar: Next is Jayfeather! Hello, Jayfeather. Could you please tell us about your eyes?

Jayfeather: THEY'RE BLUE DABBA DEE DABBA DI NA NA NA NEE NANA BYE DABBI DEE DABBA DI *turns blue*

Bluestar: NOT AGAIN!!!! 

THIS IS TURNING OUT JUST LIKE SEASON ONE!

+NO PICTURE SIGNAL+

Bluestar: OH GREAT!

+NO AUDIO SIGNAL+

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