Borrowed Time

Thirty Four

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With five hours to spare until our double date, I figured I'd stop by the hotel Dorinda and Mama stayed at, hoping to have a much needed conversation with my sister. Her latest actions were indeed questionable and concerned me greatly.

But, when I got to their room, she wasn't even present. Mama said she had been out since that morning, and hadn't notified her of where she'd be.

I thought to just leave and come back another time, but Mama insisted I'd stay because she was curious as to why I suddenly came over.

So the two of us discussed Dorinda and I told her all that my sister had done, but Mama being Mama, she always looked right through Dorinda's bullshit.

"I don't know what is it that you want me to say, Toni," she said, shrugging her shoulders. "And frankly, I don't know what it is that you want me to do either. Dorinda is grown. I am not in control of what she does."

I sighed, rolling my eyes. "You're right. She is grown. But you could at least talk to her, Ma. Sometimes it doesn't matter how old you get, you still need your mother to get you together, to tell you right from wrong." I pointed toward her as she sat right across from me on the sofa. "I told you she pulled a gun out in my shop, right after I had just offered her to work there."

"Toni," She gave me a face a curiosity, looking at me sideways. "Didn't you say she pulled it out because there was a fight? That your wife and the woman you're seeing were fighting?" Mama then waved me off, rolling her own eyes. "Please, you want your sister to be at fault here, but what you need to do is hold yourself accountable."

"Oh, so this is on me? This is my fault?" I laughed, moving my head from one side to the other. It was quite ironic that this was exactly how I expected my mother to respond. "But y'know what? This is just like you. No matter what Dorinda does, you always see past it." I rose from the sofa, growing the urge to simply walk out. But instead, I faced my mother once more and asked her, "Do you even know why Dorinda was released from service?"

"Yes," she replied, sounding utterly knowledgeable and confident. "She told me it's because she has a gambling problem. Which is why you need to cut her some slack. She's just—"

Pulling my head back a bit, I had no choice but to impede Mama's words. I couldn't believe my sister had lied the way she did, especially about something so serious. "Um, that's not right. That's not true. Mama, the real reason Dorinda was kicked out is because she—" but I stopped my own words when Dorinda suddenly entered the room, appearing to have been shaken up a bit.
"Y'know what, she's here now. She can tell you herself."

My sister had low eyes and a reddened nose—which she couldn't stop fidgeting with. "Tell her what? What you-what you talking 'bout Toni?"

Mama got up from the sofa and walked near the woman, eyeing her rather closely. "Dori, you told me that when you were released from service, it was because you have a gambling addiction." She crossed her arms above her chest, placing her head sideways. "Were you not being honest with me?"

Dorinda began to breathe heavily, incessantly grabbing onto her nose. She looked over at me, then down upon the floor. It was clear that she needed a moment to gather her guilt.
"No, Mama. I wasn't being honest. The truth is...I'm a crackhead."

"A what now?" Mama widened her eyes, allowing her mouth to gasp. "You...you telling me you're doing drugs?!" She moved even closer to my sister. "Now, Dorinda, you 'den already been down this road before and you know it wasn't nothing pretty. Why the hell do you wanna go through that again?"