#clash no. iv

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For a ten year old, living like a snake was a dangerous thing.

My quest in the Akashi household was simpler than any other maman had given me in the past. She had given me a small bottle filled with white powders and instructed me to mix it with Shiori-san's food on several occasions.

I had 30 days. All I needed was three to four successful attempts and my mission was done. The task was exceptionally easy because maman had praised my tea-making skills beforehand. Shiori-san loved tea and drank it often.  When offered, she had happily given me the responsibility to make tea for her (with a maid's assistance, always), and I had gladly snatched this opportunity to do what I was sent here for.

Even though I didn't know what the powder was, I knew it wasn't good for Shiori-san's health. Maman had told me again and again to be careful with it and to wash my mouth immediately if the powder accidentally went inside my mouth.

Shiori-san was already weak because of a flu she had caught recently. Perhaps maman knew that further deterioration of her health would be blamed on her weak immune system and that's why she had sent me at that time.

Things went well the first time. I had successfully mixed the powder with her tea. Although she had said the tea tasted different, she drank it nonetheless. I could see her condition getting worse after that. She became so weak that walking had become difficult for her.

The next attempt, however, resulted in failure. Because  Akashi Seijuro had caught me on action.

"What do you think you're doing?" He asked, his fists clenched.

"N-nothing-" I stuttered. Blood had left my cheeks and my heart was beating loudly. Maman had warned me about this. If I were to get caught, I knew she'd kill me.

"Drink it." He ordered.

"B-but... b-b-ut-"

"Drink it. Now."

Whatever it was, it obviously didn't kill instantly. I knew it by then. So I took a gulp.

"All of it." He ordered again. And I did.

"What was it?" He asked after after few minutes.

"Powdered sugar." I replied cautiously.

"Where's the rest of it?" he asked, not believing me.

"These are all I made." Despite being a good liar, my voice was shaking.

"Why'd you make powdered sugar when we already have it?"

"I just thought it'd make the tea taste better."

"It just looks different. Adding that won't make a difference." he said, still carefully examining me.

I nodded my head,

"Don't do it again, alright?" Akashi sighs after a while, finally believing me. "Don't add anything weird to her food."

"I won't." I answered quickly.

"Promise?"

I nodded.

"Promise out loud."

"I promise."

"If you ever break it, I'll call your mom and ask her to take you back home immediately. Remember that." he warned for the last time.

"I won't break it. I promise. I won't do it again." I kept saying as he left the kitchen.

But I did not keep the promise. I did not have the courage because keeping the premises I had made with Akashi Seijuro would always result in me going against maman. While retching in the restroom afterwards to, I realized I was nothing but a liar, a promise breaker and a filthy, disgusting traitor.

I had mixed the powder twice more in Shiori-san's drink after that incident. And nothing, not even Akashi Seijuro's crying face over his mother's senseless body, could stop me.

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