𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 | 𝐝𝐨𝐡𝐲𝐮𝐧

i-ship-chil

"say that again?" i sob in front of bohyun, but he shrugs me away. "tell me every fuck that you know!" i was starting to get irritated. did i shed tears for nothing?

"when he saw you cry that night in the hospital, his mind has already agreed on staying. since he didn't want to say anything about the scholarship, he twisted things up which resulted to you getting angry. he said when he gets back, he'll come into hiding and just watch you from afar," e explains while i was engraged. 

"who the fuck declines scholarships over shitty love!" i burst, getting bohyun's phone from him. 

"what the fuck are you doing?!" bohyun reaches for his phone but i had already dialed dohyun. "don't fucking dare, hyerin. he's already made up his mind!" 

"lee dohyun," i mumble, the moment he picks up.

"hyerin," 

"don't fucking reject the offer, dumbass." 

"so bohyun told you already?"

"who's stupid as fuck to reject an offer of scholarship from one of the biggest universities in the world? have you gone mad?!" 

"maybe i had," he sighs. "over you." 

"is this the fucking time to be joking?"

"hyerin, you can't change my mind. okay? bohyun tried to talk me out of it too," he stops for a while. "i want to be beside you, hyerin. what part of that you don't understand? i'll be back in a week." then he cuts the call off.

"told you," bohyun snickers as he gets his phone back. "don't be so mad about it, hyerin. he received one in seoul university too. chill,"

"how does seoul university compare to the one in states? have you gone mad with him?!" i whack his head playfully and tried refreshing my thoughts. it was as if a tsunami has gone over my body. i suddenly felt tired, as if all exhaustion from all the crying just hit me. i felt my body being drained as my legs wobbled, falling in my bed lifelessly.

----

i woke up to some noise around me, opening my eyes to reveal my friends surrounding me playing rps. 

"what the hell happened," i mumble as i sit up, as they all put their attention on me.

"your blood pressure was too low," eunhee smiles at me, which replenishes my energy.

"you haven't eaten properly, you haven't slept properly, you cried yourself to sleep then wake up then cry again, wash yourself up act as if nothing happened, then the cycle begins." dongho rolls his eyes as he pulls the blanket to me. i chuckle as i nod to everything he said, but he just scoffs.

"we heard," eunhee starts as they sit beside the hospital bed. "we also saw the folder, we were just curious," she shyly smiled and i glared at her. "dongho thought it was cute," she tried tossing it to dongho which she earned another glare from.

"so.. are you okay?" dongho asks.

"when can i get discharged? im seeing these walls too frequently," i joke around.

"when do you want, later or tomorrow?" bohyun asks as he enter the room with his phone on his hand. "i just talked to sungcheol, he's on his way." 

"how about later?" i ask bohyun as if he was my big brother. he nods slightly as he goes out again to answer another call.

"what are you planning to do to sungcheol?" eunhee asks hesitantly, although i knew it would come to that as well.

"im planning to murder him," i answer with a straight face which made them jolt. i chuckle, "what kind of question even is that? it seems like i'll do something bad," 

"if it isn't bad then what?" dongho asks back.

"i'll just have to tell him the truth. i don't know, we'll see that later," i sigh and smile. trying to ease the atmosphere. "anyways, how are you two holding up?" i wriggle my eyebrows, teasing them.

"dohyun will be back on saturday," dongho blurts out as he tried changing the topic but i wasn't tamed. "stop it," i kept wriggling my eyebrows and they just fiddled with their fingers while not looking at my eyes.

"just spill it, will you?" i ask out of irritation after a few minutes of not saying anything.

"fine," dongho groaned and nudged eunhee, telling her to tell everything but eunhee just nudges him back.

"dongho, you tell me." 

"well, to put everything shortly, we were bickering and we suddenly confessed at the same time, and then she thought you were joking when you told her i like her and i also thought you were joking when you told me she likes me and then that's pretty much it our bickering turned into a kiss--," i hit dongho's head to stop him, cringing.

"i bet everything that you two would end up dating in the end," i chuckle.

"with who?" eunhee asks curiously as my face turns into a frown.

"dohyun.." i whisper, playing with my fingers.

"what are you going to do with him?" 

"same," i answer. that was a question everybody asked me even i asked myself. what was i going to do? now that i knew we had these feelings, would we step it up? would i let him go and let him take the scholarship once again? 

we were quiet for a few minutes when we heard a knock on the door. sungheol lightly trudges in with a take out coffee in his hand, giving the two to eunhee and dongho.

"we'll leave you guys first," eunhee says with the coffee straw in her lips, pulling dongho out of the room. 

"hey, where's my coffee?" i ask as i reach my hands out. 

"coffee's bad for you. here," he hands m a carton of yogurt and i happily take it. he sits on where eunhee was sitting awhile ago, sipping on his coffee. "bohyun's outside talking to dohyun," he starts. i simply nodded, not knowing how to respond. "he talked to me already before he left," my head springs up when he said that, getting nervous. "its okay,"  he smiles cheerily. 

"its not, sungcheol." i gulp the yogurt down due to nervousness, placing the plastic on the table.

"it is," he looks at me. "did i tell you that i move on quickly? this has happened many times already, its okay." tears were already forming in his eyes but he refused to tell that it was the opposite of what he was saying. i jump down the bed and stood in front of him, pulling him into a hug.

"im sorry," i kept on mumbling while i stroke his back, and he caresses my hair. "im sorry that all that i can give you right now is this," i pressed myself more to his warmth, sniffing his scent.

we had already come this far, im sorry. 

"you've given enough," he smiles. 

"you're a great friend. you'll meet someone new," i smile at him. after staring at each other for a few minutes, i cover my eyes. 

"what are you doing?" he chuckles, trying to take my hands off my eyes.

"im sorry but if you want to cry and you don't want me to see it, then i'll cover my eyes for you." i apologetically smiled. the silence thickened and when i was slowly putting my hands down, he held it up. a few seconds later, i heard him sobbing which broke my heart too. "im sorry," was all i can say.