The Broken Kids

Chapter Twenty-Four: A.K.A FLAKA

Day 4
...

Today's the day we drive to Sweetwater, TX. I remember what happened to me there. At least the majority of it. That's where my nightmares are from...

I know I have a brother named Mateó, but I don't remember much.
Pulling up to the sight, it looks even worse than the trailer. If anything, I understand why this shit happened. Of course. We were broke. Although something felt off...
Why did pa warn me so many times when I was younger about staying away from knives?
Not only that but why haven't I remembered anything even with my set of knives?
Stepping inside the apartment, I felt irritated. Not just how I usually am, but the type of irritation that can slowly turn into a boiling rage. And from experience, it almost turns you insane.

Today I would remember the very first time it almost happened. Because as soon as I stepped into the center of the small front room connected to the kitchen, the voices would appear.

"I'm sorry Paco." I closed my eyes.

"PACO, STOP!!!!!" Another voice says making me quickly open my eyes from shock.

I'm Sorry... I'm Sorry... I'm Sorry... "PACO STOP!!!!!"
I gasped, and then I touched my cheeks and realized there were actually tears streaming down from my eyes.
I could feel the want to laugh, but the tears wouldn't stop. And the voices wouldn't stop either.

"I didn't know what to do. I'm Sorry primo."

"S-SHUT UP!!" I quickly covered my ears. The tears continued to pour, and the voices became louder.

"I should've stopped them. I should have helped you. But I was so fucking scared. I'm so sorry Paco. I'm really, really sorry."

"F-Fuck off," I tried to say, slowly falling down on both of my knees as I continued to cover my ears to block out the voice that no one else could hear but me.

"Paco it's ok, baby it's gonna be fine. Oye, Paco can you hear me?"
I could hear Lena's voice fading in and out, trying to get me out of it, but I was already inside the form of my monster.

"Please forgive me, Francisco."

"Shut up!" I now shout, my head aching this time.

Everything was spinning. My world was spinning and my vision was slowly becoming blurry because of the tears.

"I love you and I'll change, I promise."

"There is no way in hell I'd ever forgive you! I'd probably fuck you up again before I'd ever have forgiven a rat like you! And even after that I probably wouldn't. Do you fucking hear me?!"

I shouted from the top of my lungs, and just like that, the voice stopped inside my head.

I was panting heavily, and the tears continued to drop on the floor. But the soothing motion of Lena's hand on my shoulder slowly calmed me down, then everything fell silent.

I sat down and pulled my legs towards me so I could hug them.

My heart was beating so fast, and my whole body was trembling as the images of me and my prima flashed before my eyes. My fucked up head trying to keep up until that last memory surfaced...

I remember where that voice was from now. It was my prima Alejandra. And the voice of the person telling me to stop was her younger sister Zena.
They are the daughters of my brother Mateó. I was 10, she was 9 going on 10, and Zena was 8 going on 9. Both Alejandra and I were in fourth grade whereas Zena was in third.

...
~~FLASHBACK~~

"F-Flaka!! Alejandra!! Help me, please!!!"
I sobbed as they tugged my hair as they banged my head into the wall. I cried out in pain as I begged them to stop. I got punched in the gut.

"Shut the fuck up bitch!" They continued to beat me as Alejandra aka Flaka just watched. The more she watched me getting beat, getting closer to death, the closer the hatred in my heart formed.
I felt my emotions slowly grow numb to it all. The irritation and rage that formed throughout my body made my blood run cold.

You see I had already experienced numbness and pain before this incident, but my own blood just watching me as I got fucked in the head, even more, did the trick.

I don't know how, but before I knew it, I had already snapped and saw all three were on the floor. Two being boys and one is a girl. Their faces were enjoyable as the blood trickled down their foreheads.

I would soon learn that that was what I'd be seeing. Reality and me would be disconnected and I never got to hurt those kids like I wanted to. But it would cause me to hurt mi prima in that very small living room in that apartment that contained nothing but agony and hell mixed in one.
With me being satisfied my eyes locked with the person I shared blood with. That blood to me at that moment was tainted.

The fear laced within her eyes made me laugh. I was calm in a deadly sense. That would be the somewhat first yet second one aside from my sister's killer that I felt nothing for.

"Oh Alejandra, Alejandra. Tsk, tsk, tsk."

...

"What a big mistake, my dear tainted prima..."