Luminous Fire

6. Expectations

Here's the next chapter! I added the song on the side because we're all waiting to see what's going to happen between Xavier and Cristian and I like it!  Enjoy :).

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I don’t know what to say. I wanted to see him again, but I’m not ready. I don’t know why Ky wouldn’t warn me about him being here. He’s just staring. He needs to speak first, not me. 

“Hi.” He says softly.

“Hi.” I respond barely above a whisper.

“Can we talk?” Xavier asks.

“What is there to talk about?” I respond sounding harsher than I intended. I don’t know now if I want to talk after this time.

“Please, I’m sorry.”

“Why should I even talk to you know?” I didn’t think our conversation would go this way. Me being so harsh.

“I miss you, Cristian.”

I can see that he means it. I swallow because I feel the tears returning. I don’t need to cry in front of him or show him how much it has affected me. 

“I miss you too.” I whisper.

“Please let’s talk. Come take a seat on the couch, so I can apologize.”

“I don’t know.”

“Please, I want us to be together.”

I take a deep breath. I should hear his explanation. I walk to the couch and take a seat as far away from Xavier as I can. He moves closer, but leaves a gap before he takes a seat. I look at him expectantly.

“Thank you. Cristian, I’m sorry for that day and I’m sorry it has taken me this long to come talk to you. I just didn’t know how I could tell you how sorry I am for not listening to you then. I want us back together and I promise to listen and talk to you. I really have no reason for not wanting to combine our last names other than it’s what my family expects as me being the man, but we’re both men. We’re both equal. Our relationship shouldn’t make one of us more or less and it shouldn't be based on others’ expectations like you said. I understand that. I want us to combine our names and I promise that we’ll base our relationship on us. I won’t fall prey to what my family says. Please, tell me we can get pass this. Can we get pass this, Cristian?”

He’s sitting closer to me now. Can I trust him to listen and not go by others’ expectations? I can see his sincerity and his eyes are full of unshed tears. He’s reaching for my hand and I’m not doing anything to move or to stop his advance. His other hand comes up to wipe my cheek.

“Please don’t cry.” He whispers.

I didn’t realize the tears had fallen.

“Please tell me, yes.” He whispers. “I love you. Please, I don’t want to be the cause of your tears.”

I’ve missed him telling me he loves me. “How can I trust you that you won’t turn deaf ears to something we should discuss and decide together?” I ask him.

“I love you, Cristian. I’ve had time to think and I know I need to work on listening to you and not my family. I promise I will. I see you in my future and forming a family together, Cristian.”

I close my eyes. I love him. I do see myself with him. I love the warmth he’s giving me right now. 

“Do you promise that we’ll get through each decision we have to make together? Do you promise that we’ll solve our problems together without you running away from them?”