Part One | The Party

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Clementine bit into her lip as she watched them, not releasing how hard she was biting until she felt the metallic tang of blood in her mouth. She wiped the blood away and instead began to fiddle with her earrings, clutching her drink tightly in her free arm, eyes still fixed at the sight in front of her, Minerva and Violet were drunk, and they were dancing.

She shouldn't feel like this; Violet and she are friends and have been friends for years. Clementine has fought off her blooming feelings for the blonde the longest time, pretending that she doesn't stare at Violet when she's not looking, that she doesn't trace the curvatures of her face, stare deep into her eyes and wonder how someone can have such beautiful green orbs. Pretending that she doesn't hate Minerva right now for being so confident, so sure of what she wants and with no worry that she'll embarrass herself trying to get it.

She wishes she could just take Violet's hand, caress her cheek and pull her close into a kiss, closer than they've ever been before. But, unlike her confidence in everyday life she's shy when it comes to her feelings, she's worried that she'll be rejected, and she'll lose Violet as a friend as well as lose any chance to have her as a lover.

"Are you not enjoying my party, Clem?"

Clementine reluctantly pulls her eyes away from the girls and turns to face Louis who's smirking next to her, hands on his hips. She takes a swig of her vodka and coke before responding "Yeah, I'm having fun" she lies through gritted teeth, returning to her previous watch of the girls where she catches Minerva sling her arms over Violet's shoulders drunkenly slurring along to the song blaring through the house, "it's great to have a big get together like this" she mumbles looking down at the floor before gazing once more at the girl she's so hopelessly fallen for. Louis watches her carefully, following her eyes until he spots what she's been obsessing over for the last hour.

"You know, if you like her, you should say something," says Louis stepping in front of his friend and blocking her view, forcing Clementine to look up at him. Even though she's shorter than he is she looks slight, as though she's cowering, Louis notices her eyeliner is smudged around the corners and wonders if she's been crying. For the overly confident Clementine to be feeling so small she must be beaten down about something, He tries a reassuring smile.

"Look at them, Louis," she says with a sigh. Louis casts a glance over his shoulder just in time to see Minerva wrapping her arms around Violet from behind as the two sway to the beat of the song. Minerva is tugging at Violet's purple beanie trying to pull it down over her friends' eyes, Violet's laugh cuts through the music as she sloshes her beer trying to bat Minerva's hands away.

"They're just drunk, that doesn't mean anything," Louis mutters trying to make Clementine feel better in a scenario that was clearly making her feel worse. He silently scolds Violet for being so blind to Clementine's obvious hints and letting herself get so drunk that she has her hands over anyone who comes near her, including Minerva.

Clementine takes in a deep breath lifting her glass to her mouth and downing the rest of her drink, she smiles at Louis and walks towards the cluster of her friends dancing in the middle of the room. She oh so desperately wants to walk over to Violet, to pull her away from Minerva and kiss her. Fuck the other people who are watching, fuck her nerves and anxiety but she can't bring herself to do it. Instead, she wanders over to Brody and Sophie in the middle of the room who are giggling as they sing loudly to the song, jumping up and down against the beat, Clementine can't help but laugh at how drunk they both are.

"Hi girly" Brody slurs wrapping an arm around Clementine and pulling her into a messy uncoordinated hug, Clementine hopes Violet is watching. Sophie throws herself into the hug with such vigour that she knocks the two other girls off balance, sending the three of them crashing to the floor in a fit of giggles. Clementine swears under her breath as she pulls herself back into a seated position feeling her head spin, both from the alcohol and coming into contact with the cold ground. She feels eyes burrowing into her and as she tries to help Brody up, she notices Violet standing in the circle that's formed around them. She is definitely watching Clementine now.

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