Chapter 16 - Indigo

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No key, I'm not free. I'm back, locked away he has the key, but this is worse at least back there I knew what would happen, I knew what he would do to me and when. I don't know what's going to happen or who will hurt me next. The scary man kept hitting and kicking me in the van and dragged me into my new cell by my hair. My pyjamas are stained with my blood, only I didn't do it this time. I need my knife, it's the only way I know to cope, I open the skin and the feelings flow out with the blood.

I sit with my back against the wall in my new cell, cradling my knees against my chest I rock back and forth, running my fingers through my hair. I don't know what to do, what do I do? I don't have the key. I begin dragging my nails down my leg, hoping the scratches will ease the thoughts, the voices that scream at me. I can't move my left foot, I think it is broken, once I was brought into the cell three men beat me at once

"Your cousin killed our brother" they growled over and over, after every punch, every kick. I don't know what to do, will they kill me? Am I ready to die? At least if I'm dead I won't hear the voices. They're screaming at me, laughing at me telling me I'm in my prison, no key, no safety, no freedom, no routine, strange men surrounding me, they could come back at any time.

Rowan said he would always come back, will I get back to him? I can't escape, outside isn't safe, the only danger in here is the men, I can just imagine I'm back home with Daddy. If I had never met Rowan I would accept my fate, from one cell to another but my whole body longs for him, the fire his touch burns on my skin, his fingers, his lips. He eases the thoughts, he calms me and with him I know I'm safe. My thoughts fill with Rowans image, his voice and his scent, that alone begins to calm me and I slow my rocking. I jump at the loud bang that came from above me, more loud bangs follow, its guns. Gunfire on the floor above me, what does this mean? Is Rowan here to rescue me or am I next to face the barrel of the gun? I rest my forehead on my knees and rock as I drag my nails over my leg, I feel the familiar wetness of blood I've drawn, finally some reprieve.

"Indigo, come on get up we gotta get you out." I look up and it's one of Rowans brothers. I don't know his name but I've seen him at the clubhouse.

"Where's Bullet?" I ask still curled in my safe little ball

"Bullet is upstairs with the fuckers who took you, you need to come with me now, come on Indigo." His white blond hair shines under the bright light hanging above him, he's Rowans brother, but I don't know him. I should wait for Rowan, with him I'm safe. The man breaks the lock on my door and opens it before stepping inside my cell, I try to get closer to the wall but there is no where else to go.

"Indigo, I will take you to Bullet and Knuckles, you have to trust me, I'm your only way out." He says kneeling down next to me. I can do this, I have to do this, Rowan said he would always come back, I need to come back too. I nod and he helps me stand, I try to put weight on my left foot and bite my lip to hold the scream trying to escape my throat.

"I think my foot is broken." I say looking down at the limp foot hanging from my leg. Then he picks me up, I squeal and try to fight against him but he grips me tight. He runs from the cell and down a long corridor until we meet another one of Rowans brothers

"Sonny, tell them I got her, I'm heading for the van." He says as he runs passed who I now know as Sonny and up a flight of stairs. I turn and study the strange man carrying me, he wears the same leather cut Rowan does, but where Rowans says Bullet this one says Ice, that must be his name. All these names are so stupid, what would mine be? Crazy eyes? Key? Something stupid like that. I look around and realise we're outside. The sun rising above the trees and blinding me, I rest my head against Ices chest as he runs with me. He's taking me to Rowan, that's what he said and I have to believe it and trust him. He stops running and I look around, he's putting me in a van, Not again, I fight against him but he's so strong

"Indigo" I know that voice, it's the voice that calms me, the voice I dream of. I look behind Ice and see Rowan coming towards me being held up by Killer, blood flowing down his leg

"Rowan" I cry as Ice sets me down on the bumper of the van. Killer helps Rowan into the van and I throw my arms around him.

"You're safe now beautiful. Let's get you home." He whispers in my ear as his arms wrap around me, then I feel him go limp against me

"He's lost a lot of blood we gotta get him back to Doc and Cordie." Ice says climbing in the van with us. He pulls a bag from under the seat and wraps something around Rowans leg. The van begins to move and I'm nervous but I know it's taking me home with Rowan.

We arrive back at the compound and Ice and Killer carry Rowan inside

"Come on Indigo lets take you to Cordelia." Knuckles says as he picks me up from the floor of the van. He carries me into the hospital room I woke up in when I was shot. I told you outside isn't safe, I went to the store and got shot, then the scary men took me outside and hurt me and now Rowans hurt too.

"Ok Indigo, let's check you over." Cordelia says as she pulls a curtain around us

"Wait, Where's Rowan?" I ask

"He's on the bed next to you, Doc is looking at him while I look at you." She replies smiling. After X-raying my foot and giving me a sexy boot to wear Cordelia stitched up the large gash on my cheek and cleaned and stitched the other wounds left over from my beating.

"Don't worry, we can be twins. I used my best stitching techniques so I doubt there will be much of a scar." She says as I look at my face in the mirror

"I don't care about scars or I wouldn't have all these." I say pointing down to my stomach. Cordelia is helping me wash all the blood off my body and into clean pyjamas.

"There we go, good as new. Let me just check if Doc is done with Bullet and then you can see him." She says pulling back the curtain

"Is Socket ok? I saw he was hurt when they took me." I ask sitting on the edge of the bed

"He took a nasty blow to the head but he'll survive." She replies before stepping out. I pick up my crutches and stand up, Cordelia pulls back the curtain dividing me and Rowan and I sit in the chair next to him

"He lost a lot of blood but he'll be ok. I'll leave you with him just shout if you need me." Cordelia says before leaving. I take his hand in mine and rest my head on his arm, I'm safe now and I feel myself begin to drift off to sleep.

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