My Love??

Chapter 30

April's POV

Its been a week and Tristan is still standing out there everyday at 8 o'clock in the morning he stands there and walks off at 10 o'clock in the evening. He doesn't eat and I can tell his losing weight, he doesn't sleep I can tell from his dark eyebags. My heart yearns to hold him and tell him I love him cause I still do but I am not ready to forgive him. I haven't seen Alex in a while, his giving me space and I appreciate it. "Is he still there?" Cait asks and I nod. His eyes are still on my room window but I have been staying in my parents room watching him come and go. I take a deep breath and walk out of the room. "Where are you going?"

"I am going to talk to him, this needs to end." Cait doesn't say anything more and just nods. I open the door and instantly Tristan's eyes fall on me my legs feel like jelly as memories of how he treated me start flooding back, he meets my gaze and I gesture him inside. He takes cautious steps afraid he would scare me off. "What do you want?" I ask my voice calm though I am a storm inside.

"I need to explain but first just look at this so you at least have an open mind." he hands me his phone and I see a message from Alex, my hands shake while reading what my so called best friend wrote. How could he do this to me after everything I forward the message to Cait then hand him his phone back. I nod for him to continue,"I was upset after that and I went drinking the next thing I know I wake up in bed with her. I know nothing can excuse what I did but I wasn't thinking. When I saw you by my door I just kept replaying how I saw you too and your laugh then this. I just saw red and I let out all my frustration on you and I am so sorry. You don't deserve how I treated you. Please just give me a chance to make it right."

I slap him right across the face and my hand imprint shows on his cheek. I can feel the tears in my eyes but I blink them away," I understand but Alex didn't force you to go find that girl, he didn't force you to insult, he didn't force you to humiliate me and he didn't force you to not believe in me. That was all you." i say while poking him on the chest, "I found you in bed with another girl but I still wanted to explain it to you, you insulted me at the beach house but I still followed you back here. That's how much I trusted you, how much I loved you." His eyes widen at the use of past tense but he nods.

"I am so sorry, I will do anything to make it up to you." I slap him once more letting all my frustration out and now both cheeks have my handprint, tears roll down his cheeks but I can't keep looking at him, I need time. I have to clear my head all I can see is the girl and his cold dead eyes staring at me, telling me to leave. It hurts so bad.

"I need time to think and process everything, please." he nods. I look at him from head to toe and for the first time since he walked in I realize his changed so much from that guy. The guy who rejected me. I remember the guy who helped me get home after my concussion, who comforted me when I was drunk and the guy who patiently waited for me to realize he loved me and will always be there. Can I let a guy like that go, yes he hurt me but he regrets it. I know if I left him, I would regret it for life. I love him for crying out loud, how can I just pretend I never did. I want my Tristan but I know distance will help us to get our bearings and see what we want. If after some time I still want him then I will give us a chance but if I don't I will realize it was never real. My heart clenches at the thought, I want it to be real. He starts walking towards the door his shoulders drooped showing defeat, tears start burning my eyes at the thought of never having him close, never laughing with him and I can't imagine it. As his hand reaches for the handle l I continue, "I don't want you on my front yard anymore, I need you to be home and to sleep and eat cause I don't like seeing you like this." I offer him a small smile which he returns, "If I choose to forgive you, I want to see the same guy I had these last couple weeks." His smile is bright and I can see the hope in his eyes and I know my eyes are glittering the same way.

"I will wait for you, please be my date to Prom. I love you and I wouldn't want to spend it with anyone else." he says as he walks out of the house.

My heart is hammering and I want to forgive him. "I think you should forgive him, he loves you." Cait says with a small smile on my face. I turned  to her shocked and she shrugs, "What can I say, I am a sucker for a happy ending and you deserve one." I nod at her and I can't wait till Prom and I will get him back as mine. "Now let's go dress shopping, we need you glowing when he sees you, he won't be able to keep his hands off of you."

Short chapter..... But got the point across.