infection | D. Dixon

chapter fourty-one

daryl

I woke up in the school, tied to the bed with fresh stitches in my side and a bandage around my sore wrist and knuckles. Rick sat on the foot of the bed with his beaten face in his dirty hands. I tugged at the handcuff and groaned at the throbbing in my head. "You're awake." Rick said. "Good. We need to talk."

I nodded and pointed to the glass of water next to the bed. He sighed and got up to pass it to me. I downed he water and stared at him, waiting for him to speak.

"You never settled down at the prison. You were too wild, almost got people killed." Rick stated sternly as if I were a child he could scold. "You found us. Brought us in. I want to thank you for that," he said.

"But?" I rasped.

"But," he continued, "upon group vote, we have decided that the group would be better off without you. Look what you've done to me for example. What if it were Carl? Or Beth, or Tessa?"

I nodded to myself, "Bullshit." I sighed, "But if you really want me to leave you have to say it." I looked him dead in the eye. "Is this what you want?"

"It doesn't matter what I want." Rick retorted. "You leave in the morning." Rick took off the cuffs and started to walk away.

"Daryl?" I questioned.

Rick locked eyes with me and hesitated. "he died at the camp." he answered, leaving me with my pool of emotions.

Tears slipped from my eyes as I stared at the wall. I walked over to the bathroom and stared at my reflection. My fist met the mirror and it shattered. When no one came in I grabbed the largest piece could find. I started slicing at my hair until it was at chin length. I washed up my face and hands, watching he water turn bloody and brown. I stripped off and stepped into the cold shower. The water stung and made me uncomfortable so I didn't stay in long. I got out of the shower and changed, wrapping my bandages before I put on a shirt.

I walked through the halls with my weapons. Hoping to make a clean break was pointless, but hoping to see the grave before I left wasn't impossible. But I couldn't find a grave, so when I left I did it with my head hung and an emptiness in my gut. I had to believe Tessa would be fine, she had Merle.

But who did I have now? No one. They would kill Lonnie. Maybe they already have, did they even try to save Daryl? Why did Rick kick me off him when I could have saved him? Why am I still alive when he's dead? He deserved to live, not me.

I stopped when I came across a car. I slipped inside and turned over, waiting for morning light before continuing my journey.

+

I heard the door to the car open. I swung around to see who was there, but I didn't get a chance to. A hand slapped over my mouth.

I looked at the person and my eyes widened, "don't scream there's walkers outside," Rick hissed, climbing into the car once he let me go.

"Why are you here." I whispered, "you wanted my ass gone."

"I lied to you. Daryl is alive." he said quietly as his eyes darted away from me.

"What. The. Hell. Is wrong with you?!" I hissed, "you can't tell me he was-" I stopped when another hand slammed on the windshield. This hand was a dead hand. "How many?" I asked.