Sonata (Harry Styles FanFiction)

40. Regret

"We've talked about this Darien, you can't keep breaking into professor's offices whenever you don't agree with-..." he trailed off, his eyes glued to the chair across the room. The chair with my jeans on it. Holy mother fucking shit balls, goddamn.

"Please dear god, tell me you're wearing your fucking pants, Darien," Caleb choked out and I could hear the unnerved anger in his voice.

"Uh..."

Darien Grace

"Jesus Christ, give me strength," Caleb groaned, pushing his glasses up into his hair to rub his eyes. I could see the new tension coiling in his now rigid form and the pulsing vein in his neck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. I had no fucking idea what to say. What could I say? I'd just been caught half naked in my fuck buddy of a professor's office, snooping through his computer by my adopted father figure.

We were both at a loss for words and that fact alone signified how deep the shit was that I was currently drowning in. A silent Caleb was a terrifying Caleb. He suddenly took a deep breath, his usually warm brown eyes snapping up to meet my terrified cobalt gaze.

"Darien Amelia Grace, in an attempt to try and retain at least a bit of my sanity, I'm going to do my best to not jump to conclusions. However, if anyone other than myself had walked through that door and seen you— like this— they wouldn't think twice about questioning your intentions. What exactly were you thinking?" I swallowed at his words. Where the fuck was he going with this?

"The door was locked and every office on this floor was empty," I hedged, picking at my chipping slate-grey nail polish; I needed to get them redone before my next shift at Daniel's. "Where was everybody?" My voice was quiet and meek— only Caleb truly had the power to intimidate me. He, John, and Jas were the only family I had left. The thought of losing them took my breath away.

"There was a board meeting to discuss Professor Walsh's pregnancy," he muttered, waving awake my question, "Darien, I am not the only faculty member with a set of keys. Any one of the other administrators could have walked into this office." The answer was so obvious that I wanted to careen headfirst into a brick wall. Hadn't I just been complaining about Harry's ignorance and here I was living it.

Fucking hell. Shit fuck. Fuck it. Fuck me. Fuck everything. F. U. C. K.

I shifted uncomfortably in Harry's desk chair, my nakedness thankfully obscured by the large desk. I felt the most free when I was wearing the least amount of clothing possible, but being underdressed around Caleb set my teeth on edge. It was wrong— morally and spiritually wrong.

"I'm struggling to not assume that you were here with every intention of seducing your teacher and effectively ruining his career as well as my own; not to mention ensuring your immediate dismissal."

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Still, I couldn't say anything. My conscious had made a miraculous reappearance after a seven year absence.

Caleb sighed again, "Please dear god tell me you haven't... fornicated with the boy?" He asked quietly, pushing the door closed before collapsing in the empty chair across the desk from me.

"Fornicated?" I couldn't help the bubble of hysterical laughter that slipped out. Trust the English professor to pick the most elegant and clinical way to describe sex.

"This is not something to laugh about. Have you or have you not?"

I swallowed audibly. He was actually panicking. I'd only ever seen him this stressed and scared once before, and that was when I woke up in the hospital with an IV drip nurturing my severely malnourished body.