X-Marks: Hiding Shadows

Winner

"Go fish," Evee said, with a grin that peeked over the tops of her cards.

Mat threw his cards to the center of the circle, "No fair!" he said.

"It was fair when you won," Evee said and pointed her finger at him.

Mat leaned back into his corner of the basement, the hood of his sweater was pulled past his brows. Ocean shuffled the cards once more and passed another deck around, but Mat pushed his cards away.

"You're not playing?" Ocean said, with his deck in her hands.

Mat shook his head no and put folded his arms to his chest.

"Even better," Evee snickered and took his cards instead.

The game was fun, but not with only three. He just had to ruin everything and anything at all.

"Come on, Mat," I said and took my deck from Ocean, "Why are you always get like this? You don't always have to win."

"Not win?" Mat said, and leaned forward with his brows crossed, "What's the point of playing if you're not going to win?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose to keep my eyes focused.

Ocean spoke softly, "I think, what Valen is trying to say. That it's more fun. You know, when we all get a chance to win."

"Whatever," Mat said and pulled his hood to block his eyes, "You girls can play your girly games and not win."

This was fine with me, and judging by how quick Evee set her cards back into position it was okay with her too. We continued to examine our cards without speaking.

"What do you mean by, I'm always like this?" Mat said and broke my concentration.

"Really, Mat?" Evee laughed and held her hand to her forehead.

"What!?" Mat said, threw his hands up.

"Are you sure you don't know?," Evee said, "Playing circles? Kickball? Being the first at water fountains? You have to win at everything."

"I'd rather win at something than have nothing like the rest of you," he said.

Ocean's chest deflated as she laid her card in the center of the circle for all to see. Our game ended before it had started and all because of him.

"Maybe you don't remember," I said and stared into Mat's faceless black hood, "But none of us, including you, have anything. No home, no family or a plate of food that wasn't given to us by strangers. So maybe the rest of us are trying to enjoy the little we do get to keep, in peace."

No one spoke. What was said was said, and I couldn't take any of it back, even if I wanted to.

"I'm done with you, all of you," Mat said, and pushed his pillow away from the center of the circle.

I felt nothing, for once because there was no more to say. Only a desperate need to leave this ice castle for good, and the ice prince with it.

"We're all shadows Mat," Ocean said, and pierced our tension.

"Ocean, what are you talking about?" Evee asked in slowed words.

Ocean folded her legs into her chest, "I heard the nurses call us that before. Shadows."

I sunk deeper into my blanket and poured over her words. A shadow, something that's always there but rarely noticed. It fit us all like a tailored glove.

"Mat," Ocean said and looked at Mat with kind eyes, "I know it may feel like we don't understand you. Or that we don't care, but no one understands you more than we do. We're all shadows, just like you."

Mat folded to his side and deeper into his corner, "Just go away," he said.

I placed my hand on Oceans back and rubbed the rough knit sweater. Evee held her hand. Oceans eyes were glazed with tears. She always cared about Mat more than Evee or I ever could.

Shadow or not, he had no reason to treat Ocean this way. A burn in my chest hit my mouth as it fought to stay shut.

I couldn't believe I thought, I could ever like him.