In Sickness and In Health

Camping, Clubbing and Sleep

Cole POV

We are currently in the middle of our dinner with the our old cast mates, we are all finished eating a while ago so we are just sitting at random tables talking to everybody. I'm currently talking to Charles and Paul Biason the former sound director of the show. We're talking about camping and the glories of the wild outdoors. We laugh and joke how we used to spend our weekends off camping around the Canadian wilderness and how we would love to do it again. We are trying to organise a weekend for a group of us guys to go camping in Scarborough as we never made it to Toronto while filming. I suggest the beginning of May as I'm free. Charles says it sounds good , Paul says he'll check with his wife. We say we'll invite KJ and Jordan too and see if Casey if he's free.

In the midst of all this I glance to Lili she's talking to Rosa our old hair stylist, Camila, Asha , Madalaine and Hayley. She's laughing and smiling which is good to see after her meltdown earlier this evening. She just began to fret literally at the last second, she wanted to go to back to New York and just go to bed. I know at the time she was probably annoyed at me for convincing her to go but I hope she's happy now with her decision.

Her self esteem has definitely plummeted since she began radiation, every one always has an ounce of self doubt but since her first radiation appointment something switched, she began to cry more and walk around the house drifting along not living. Eating and drinking for survival, she has lost a substantial amount of weight, she was never a big girl anyway but now she is a just a collection of bones connected and supported by skin. She is still beautiful but she lacks self confidence.

I think when her hair began to fall out it hit her pretty hard.  I remember the day when her hair first began to fall out. She was in the bathroom upstairs and we had just come back from the hospital after her second day of treatment, she was surprisingly perky. We decided to rent a movie and order take out, when she didn't come out after ten minutes I was concerned so I went upstairs and knocked on the door I heard crying I pushed the door open and there she was sitting on the toilet pouring her eyes out wearing a shower cap she screamed at me at me to get out because she thought I shouldn't see her like this. She sat there crying for a solid five minutes when she finally lifted her head up and she stood up and I gave her a hug and asked her what was the matter, she showed me the sink it was full of her luscious blonde locks.

" I was just fixing my hair and it just began to fall out it in clumps," I remember her saying sniffling throughout.

I told that she was still absolutely stunning despite having very little hair on her scalp and that I didn't fall in love with her because of her hair I fell in love with her for her loving personality , her humour and her big heart. We then went downstairs and cuddled up on the sofa rewatching old episodes of "Everyone Loves Raymond." The next day her lashes weakened and fell out along with her eyebrow hair she teared up a bit over that but not as much for when she lost her hair on her head.

The day after that I brought her to Rapunzel's Hair Salon in Brooklyn, a charity run by volunteers that specialises in making wigs for cancer patients. The lady who dealt with us was incredibly sweet. Her name was Hilda and she made Lili feel relaxed and comfortable she talked us through the process of wearing and how to place the wig on and off in the end we selected three wigs, a blonde one much like Lili's own hair , a brunette one and a hot pink one as we were feeling a little rebellious and I wanted Lili to feel that she could have a bit of fun. She's got used to wearing them she wears the blonde one more often than the others as it feels more like her own hair than the brunette and pink one but its always good to have the option.

I check the time at it is coming up to half eleven, the guys want to head to Spirit the old night club we used to go to for old times sake, I head over to Lili's table and asking if it is okay if I head off with the boys.

"Of course you can Cole you deserve a night out after putting up with me," she says smiling.

"Are you sure? I can stay here if you would prefer that?" I ask as I don't want her to feel like she's alone.

"Listen Cole, I'm fine here with the girls, enjoy yourself," she says giving me a kiss on the cheek as a seal of approval.

"Thanks gorgeous" I reply substituting her cheek kiss for a subtle kiss on the lips.

Us guys head to Spirit and for once in my life I don't enjoy the atmosphere of clubbing, over a thousand people cramped into a stuffy and sweaty room, the flashing lights blaring in your face and the music blaring peaking at one hundred decibels making it impossible to hear what anyone is saying. After about an hour of this "disco" I tell the guys I'm calling it a night, they try and persuade me to stay on but I make the excuse that I'm tired and I will talk to them in the morning. 

I get a taxi back to the hotel and I open the hotel room door and notice a note of the coffee table.

Lili felt tired so we brought her back to your room where she fell asleep almost instantly,
See you in the morning

Cami

I turn to the bed and there she is lying under the sheet, the wig at the end of the bed. I take of my shirt and my trousers and throw on the t-shirt I had left on the radiator and join her in bed, I kiss her cheek softly and cuddle her softly as I fall into a deep sleep...

Hey guys hope you enjoyed the chapter!
Lots of love
L💗