Everlasting

Chapter 12

Katniss P.O.V.

"What happened?" Haymitch asks as we enter the waiting room.

"She almost passed out in the hallway," Peeta says as he gently sits me down in a chair. He slowly coaxes me to eat, but I can already tell that it probably won't stay down.

"Kat, I know you're worried, but you have to take care of yourself too. Okay?" Peeta tells me.

I nod my head. "You do too."

"I am," Peeta assures me. "Why don't you try to get some sleep?"

"Absolutely not," I say as I shake my head.

"Katniss, you wearing yourself out isn't going to help Rye," Peeta says. "We will wake you up if anything happens." I shake my head again.

"Not until I see our baby boy," I say. Peeta sighs. "Peeta, I need to know that he's okay before I close my eyes." Peeta opens his mouth to say something, but Haymitch stops him.

"Don't waste your breath," Haymitch tells Peeta. "If she sits there much longer, she'll fall asleep anyways." I know he's right, so I get up and start walking again. "I didn't mean for you to pace the room trying to stay awake," Haymitch says.

"Shouldn't have given her any ideas," Peeta mutters. I turn to look at him and scowl.

"Are you kidding me?" I ask him. "Do you not realize that that's also your son back there fighting for his life?" Peeta gives me a look.

"Of course I realize that, Katniss," Peeta tells me.

"Then act like it," I snap. "All you've been doing the entire time we've been here is telling me that I need to calm down as if nothing's wrong."

"Kaniss, that's not what I…"

I don't let him finish. "Maybe you need to start acting concerned for our baby boy." Peeta gapes at me.

"Are you insinuating that I don't care about Rye?" Peeta asks as he stands up. I shake my head.

"Of course not, Peeta…"

"That's what it sounds like to me!"

"Me too," Haymitch says. I glare at him before looking back at Peeta.

"Give me the car keys," I tell Peeta. 

"What?"

"Give. Me. The. Car. Keys." Peeta reluctantly digs the keys out of his pocket and hands them to me. I storm out of the waiting room, slamming the door behind me, and hurry outside to the car.

I have no intentions of going anywhere, but I needed to be alone for a moment. I just sit in the driver's seat and take my frustrations out on the steering wheel by beating my fists against it. I start crying and I lay my forehead on my folded arms.

I'm not mad at Peeta. I just needed to take my anger out on something. Someone. And poor Peeta made the wrong move, which really wasn't a wrong move. He was just trying to take care of me.

Someone knocks on the passenger's door, and I look over to see Peeta standing there. I turn my head away. I'm not ready to face him yet.

"Please, Katniss," Peeta says. I take a deep breath and hesitantly unlock the door. Peeta sits down in the seat, but neither of us say anything. We just stare straight ahead. 

Peeta slowly reaches over and takes my hand in his. He squeezes my hand and takes a deep breath.

"The doctor said that we could go see Rye at any time," Peeta says. "Do you want to go now?" I slowly nod my head, and we get out of the car before heading back towards the hospital. I want to apologize, but I decide to wait until after we see Rye.

"They said we can't visit for very long," Peeta says. "They need to do some more tests to make sure that it was just because his fever spiked. The doctor said he should be fine now, and we can't stay in his room tonight." I nod my head, but I still don't say anything.

Once we reach Rye's room, Peeta opens the door, and… and I stop in my tracks.

I was expecting all kinds of wires and tubes and machines to be hooked up to our baby's tiny body. So it's a huge relief to see that's there's only one I.V. running into Rye's tiny arm. He's laying in a plastic crib that resembles his bassinet, and he's sleeping peacefully.

"Oh, my poor baby boy," I say as I gently lay my hand on Rye's head. I brush his hair back and he yawns. Peeta stands on the other side of the little crib, and I can tell he's avoiding eye contact with me. There's a knock on the door, and I turn to see a nurse walk into the room.

"I'm sorry, but you two will have to leave now," the nurse says. "While you can't stay in the room with him you are welcomed to stay in the waiting room tonight."

"Thank you," I say softly. I turn and give Rye a gentle kiss on his forehead. "I love you, baby boy," I say. "We'll be back to see you in the morning." Without looking at Peeta, I turn to leave the room and start towards the waiting room. Haymitch is still sitting there, but I don't get the smart alkeck remark that I was expecting. When Peeta finally comes back into the room, Haymitch looks over at us.

"Why don't you two go on home?" Haymitch says. "Get some rest."

I look at Haymitch like he's crazy. "No," I say as I shake my head.

"Look, Rye's going to be okay," he says. "You two can't do anything and you can't see him again tonight anyways. I'll stay here and call you if anything happens."

"No, Haymitch. We couldn't ask you to do that," I say.

"You're not asking me to do anything," Haymitch says "I'm telling you two to go home and relax."

I look over at Peeta and he nods his head. "I think it would be best for both of us," Peeta tells me. "We can't do anything for Rye, we can't see him until morning, and even if something did happen, they wouldn't let us into the room anyways."

"Okay," I barely say. I look back at Haymitch. "Are you sure it's…"

"Go," Haymitch says before I even finish my question. I nod, and Peeta and I reluctantly leave the room. We walk back out to the car, but Peeta gets in the driver's seat this time. 

We barely get ten feet away from the hospital when I notice something. Peeta keeps wiping his eyes, and that's when my heart literally breaks. He's just as upset as I am, but he's been trying to stay strong for me. And I know that my snide remark only made him feel worse. I start feeling guilty, and the tears aren't far behind.

"I'm sorry!" I cry. I barely get the words out before Peeta quickly pulls the car off onto the side of the road. He quickly gets out of the car and comes over to my side. He opens the door and kneels down on the ground beside of me before tightly wrapping me up in his arms.

"I'm sorry," I say again. "I didn't meant it. I let my emotions get the best of me."

"It's okay," Peeta says quietly. I shake my head.

"No, it's not," I say truthfully. "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, and I know that you love Rye, just like I know you love me and Willow. I didn't mean to sound like I thought any different. I… I just…"

Peeta stops me by pressing his lips firmly to mine. I keep trying to talk, but I eventually give up and just kiss him back.

"I know," Peeta says as he pulls back a little.

"Do you forgive me?"

"Of course," Peeta says without a second of hesitation. "Now let's go home. Okay?" I nod my head, and Peeta gets back into the car. Once Peeta and I get home, we head upstairs to bed. We lay down side by side, and Peeta pulls me close to him. I look up at him and see just how much he's battling to keep it all in.

"I know you're trying to stay strong for me," I say softly. "But you don't always have to be the tough one." And with that, Peeta breaks down.

I hold him just as he holds me as sobs wrack his body. Eventually, Peeta cries himself out, and we both fall asleep holding onto each other for support.