M.U.S.E. (BOOK 1) (COMPLETE)

M.U.S.E Chapter 25

I hadn't seen John all morning as he was in with his dad talking. His mum was lovely and made us all breakfast. The children were in the garden playing and Charlie was staring at his nanny in awe of a stranger and pulling his funny faces cracking us up.

"Ooo you wait till the others see you, they are going to eat you up," his mum said as she gave him a kiss and cuddle. He started cooing at her and she waffled back to him making me swell with pride at having made such a gorgeous baby.

"Do you want me to take that through to them for you?" I asked pointing at the drinks for John and his dad.

"Oh yes darling, sorry I got caught up in this beautiful grandson of mine," she said. "Just down the hall, third door on the right."

I picked up the drinks and headed down the hall. The door was ajar and no one was in it but I could hear voices on the terrace. I decided to leave the drinks on the table and go tell them where they were.

"How the hell did you manage to get yourself in this mess?" his dad said.

"It was a mistake," John said.

"Getting a woman pregnant and having a baby is not a mistake, it's a fucking catastrophe," his dad corrected him. "You should be more careful where you are putting that thing."

"We were on a job together. It was a cover story how the hell was I suppose to know she would get pregnant," John replied.

"Wear a bloody condom," his father replied.

"I do usually, but it was marriage cover and for newly weds apparently trying for a baby so it would look dodgy to have no soiled sheets and condoms everywhere," John replied.

"You could have said she was too ill, tired or had fell out with you to avoid sex but you didn't. You saw that fine piece of ass and thought you'd tap it," his father argued.

"No it wasn't like that at all," John argued. "And she is not a fine piece of ass. It was really bad sex which I have mentally blocked out so don't even think for one minute I enjoyed it. Far from it."

I stood listening unable to move as I took in every word.

"Yeah right," his dad replied.

"It was, she was mechanical, like a prostitute, move here, move there. Constantly alternating position and faking orgasms. It was like fucking a blow up doll or mannequin. A foul mouthed mannequin. When she wasn't swearing or talking dirty she was 'Oooing and ahhhing' like a porn star," John said. "I haven't been near her since, thankfully. Charlie was the result of a turkey baster at Christmas before you even think of asking and I only did that for Aimee as she wanted a little brother or sister."

His father laughed. "Are you sure you didn't think about Cara whilst whacking one off?"

"If I had thought about her Charlie wouldn't be here," he replied.

"Bet you were pissed off when you found out you were a daddy," his father said.

"I can't undo it so what is the point in being angry over it. Cara is as much of a victim of circumstance as I was. She didn't trap me, they did. I don't regret Aimee being conceived as she is my child, the same as Charlie but everything else that comes along with it I can do without," John said.

"Especially the sexless pretend marriage," his dad said.

"You can say that again," John replied and sighed.

I turned to walked out of the room and saw John's mum stood there with the baby in her arms. She had heard it too. Great!

"Why haven't you just bumped her off and be done with it before she hit's the self destruct button again and tops you all in your sleep? It's less baggage and that other kid should be got rid of too. With that blonde hair he attracts unnecessary attention to you as it is more than obvious he's not your breeding stock. Just get your head together and sort it out. You have to think of Aimee and Charlie. You have had more than one chance to pull the plug. Why didn't you?" his father asked John as I stared at his mother.

"Believe me I have regretted it on more than one occasion," John said.

"Is it because she is the mother of your children?" his father asked. "Someone else can do it."

"Gordon offered," John informed him.

"So why refuse?" his father asked.

"I don't know," John replied.

"Do you want me to do it?" his father asked.

"I don't know," John replied.

"What you are going to fuck about with her old times sakes?" his father asked.

"No," John replied.

"Fine decision made then. I will do it," his father replied. "Put her out of her misery."

On hearing that I walked past his mother and went to my room. I sat on the bed and fought the urge to steal some car keys and just leave. His mother walked in and put the baby down to sleep.

"Come here sweetheart," she said offering me a cuddle.

I shook my head and lay down on bed facing away from her. I wasn't going to cry.

"You know it is ok to be upset," she whispered. "You just overheard some very unflattering and serious things. It's enough to make any girl cry."

I closed my eyes and couldn't hold in anymore as I cried as quietly as I could.

"Hi mum," I heard called from the other side of the house.

"Oh shit," his mum said. "I'll leave you to have some alone time."

I heard her leave the room and telling everyone to keep the noise down as the baby and I were having a nap. Then squeals of joy as one female voice found John and gave him a big hug. Followed by another squeal as she saw Aimee in the garden. "Oh she is gorgeous, she looks just like me, John," she said laughing.

"Me, you mean," his dad said.

"Oh dad we all look like you, except Billy because he is the milkman's," the woman said and they all laughed.

I didn't know what to do. I was too scared to go, too scared to stay. I didn't want to leave my children and I didn't want to stay with John. I had to protect Finn and the image of him running scared as Johns dad shot him dead was haunting me.

I prepared a bag and opened the door as I heard Finn nearby.

"Come here baby," I whispered to him. He smiled and toddled over. I picked him up headed to the front door and never looked back.