Love to Hate You

Chapter Seven

My heart is beating hard against my ribcage, pounding in my ears. I love the rush I get from this, the rush I get from stepping on stage. It’s a feeling that might get mistaken with nervousness or an urge to pass out, but I’m not that nervous. I’ve done this before. Although, I’m not properly rehearsed and my performance is bound to be rusty, I don’t feel embarrassed or sick in the slightest. What I’m feeling now is excitedness.

My eyes scan the crowd, noticing how much smaller it is compared to the last time I was here to perform.  I suppose the hype must have worn out after the drama I caused within the band. It must have been comedic for our school, our town, to see such a battle between Justin and myself. Heck, we were probably better than cable. However, I had to leave and the announcement caused some damage and the Heartbreakers lost a considerable amount of popularity. Now, what’s left of the thinning crowd of teenagers remains true fans. For them, I’m incredibly grateful. They haven’t given up on the boys.

Sure, the boys are less exciting without me, if I do say so myself, but nonetheless talented.

I take in the looks of complete shock coming from the group of people gathered in the café. They look truly surprised to see me standing up here. Some of them even glancing around to see if they aren’t crazy, that other people are, in fact, are aware of my presence. I smile at them and wave.

Yes, I am here and yes I am going to sing.

Justin hands me a mic, and I notice the red tape at the base, signaling to me that it is in fact mine. I look down at the mic and raise an eyebrow before shoving it back in his hand and taking his mic instead.

Leaning in closer to Justin, I turn to whisper in his ear, “Don’t think I’ve forgotten about the little incident.”

When I’ve leaned back he looks at me confusedly so I stick my tongue out at him. His eyes widen in realization and he sputters, laughing into his hand.

“Carrots, are you going to hold that against me forever?” he asks.

I only nod and take a step away from him, looking over my shoulder at the boys who have now settled behind their instruments.

“Good evening everyone!” Justin laughs cheerily into his mic, giving a slight wave and winking to the audience of mostly desperate teenage girls.

I roll my eyes. Even at a time like this he still does this sort of subtle flirting. The realization makes me freeze a little and I send him a little glare.

Um, Justin darling, you are on trial. And that little wink just then ticked me off. Oh yes, I can admit that this relationship is based entirely on jealousy.

Justin doesn’t seem to notice the glare and continues on with his little speech, but someone else does notice. I hear an almost inaudible snort and glance back at Sean who is trying to conceal a little smile while looking down at his keyboard.

He really shouldn’t even try to hide it. I know he probably thinks it was foolish of me to actually give in to Justin. Not to mention, he’s kind of ticked off at the moment. Every time Justin slips up, Sean will be the one who notices and he will be the one to rub it in my face when he ends up being right.

I try to shrug it off, turning back to the crowd and tuning back into Justin’s speech at just the right time.

“We have very special girl with us tonight, a former Heartbreaker if you must know,” I cringe on the word former and how it reminds me that this is only temporary. I’m like a guest singer. I can’t stay. I’m not really part of the band until I show up for practices again, “and it’s also her birthday. She wanted to sing with us again on her birthday so please give her a warm welcome.” At this the crowd claps and cheers enthusiastically and I blush, “I think it’s only appropriate that we begin this with a certain song I’m sure you all know.”