XXXV - THOUGHTS.

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XXXV - THOUGHTS.

I wanted to kill myself in my head.

I honestly couldn't take this anymore.

What had really become of my life?

I was going to do big things. I wanted to help people, and marry a man who would treat me like a Queen. We would live in a big house, and by then, I would be pregnant with our first child. Everything would be fantastic, no dodging bullets, being kidnapped, worrying for my life.

I had been ripped from my calm existence back home.

Now I had a marriage that was falling apart, and had been falling apart from the start, an insane man who wanted me to himself and was so unpredictable, but swore up and down that he was telling me the truth about my husband- who was locked in his basement.

Now that man is in love with me, and now I have twins who each want me to themselves.

What about my little boy?

Will he ever get a chance to spend time with his real father? I know that Romelo misses his deeply, and I miss us being a family.

Even if that family was fucked up, it meant something to me.

I rolled over, hugging my knees to my chest. I didn't even bother to see if Lorenzo was still here. He said he had some business to handle, but for all I know he could be downstairs, beating the shit out of Romelo.

I'm really worried about him..

I couldn't sleep.

I had to do something..

But I wasn't so sure what I could do..

I was afraid that if I tried to free Romelo, Lorenzo would catch me and kill me..right in front of Romelo. I knew that Romelo wouldn't want that..

I bit my lip, and sighed.

For once, Romelo's in a tight spot that he can't get out of, and I'll have to be the one to help him out of this.

I simply need to get a plan..

I sat up in the bed, pulling my knees to my chest.

It's crazy how I've gotten thrown into this.

I can really only hope that I can go back home, and live out a normal life.




Lorenzo walked around me, sighing.

"You know, it's honestly pitiful..that look you have in your eyes. You miss her, don't you, big brother?"

I didn't bother to lift my head.

It was true.

I missed Aaliyah more than anything. Yeah, I can be a lot to handle at times, but Aaliyah dealt with it. She made me feel better about myself, honestly. I need her here with me.

I've taken her love for granted, sometimes..and I know I don't deserve her, because if she knew the truth, would she still love me? I'm scared of her hating me. I've never really felt this way, and that's why I feel the need to be so protective of her.

Now I'm in a situation where I can't protect her..

All I really want is my family back..

I'd give up anything for them.

Lorenzo chuckled, and lifted my head up with the knife. "It's sad to see you like this. Now I'm in charge, and you're just weak and defenseless.."

I didn't know how Lorenzo had gotten the story so...twisted.

"Those are lies, and you know it.."

He laughed, "I wouldn't be so bold, if I were you, Romelo."

I never understood why Lorenzo showed such...animosity towards me. If anything, he was the twin that got everything he wanted; the girls, the grades, the praise, anything.

I was the one left in the background.

Lorenzo had stolen plenty of things from me..like the love from my parents.

Lorenzo always didn't have green eyes, they just sort of..appeared in elementary. But that wasn't the start. When were kids, Lorenzo had all the attention. I was left behind, like normal. I was simply a placeholder..

I remember one time when I was showing my mother my grades. She was looking them over, and I was proud of myself for making all A's and B's that time. Lorenzo came in, and he only had say that he made all A's, and my mother praised him. He hadn't even done the work, I did.

And I remember her saying exactly, "Why can't you be more like your brother?"

My heart broke hearing those words.

"Mom loved you more than me."

I shook my head, "She didn't love me at all."

Lorenzo fell silent, and I felt tears stream down my cheeks.

Every time I had something great, Lorenzo had to come along and steal it from me. Like Aaliyah and Ramiro..they're my family, mine..why does he want them?

Why can't I be happy?

I know he doesn't love her, he loves the fact that once again, he has something of mine, and knows I might not be able to get it back. Aaliyah..I hope she doesn't love him..

I looked up at Lorenzo, and he frowned at me.

"I can't wait for the day when Aaliyah will give it up to me..I know that'll crush you.."

And I hated that it was true.

I watched Lorenzo as he pushed items around on his cart, in this small silver tray. He had a needle in his hand, filled with some blue liquid.

He thumped the side, and turned to me, lifting my right arm up. He inserted the needle into my arm, injecting the foreign liquid into my vein.

"That should keep you tired for at least a few hours.."



Ramiro slept soundly in between Lorenzo and I, and I kissed his forehead.

I pushed the covers aside, getting out of bed carefully, so I wouldn't wake them.

Earlier, I had been watching Lorenzo carefully. He hides the key to the door in one of the cabinets, but I wasn't sure which one. I pulled on my sweatpants, and made my way down the stairs, and into the kitchen.

I knew that Romelo probably didn't eat today. I made him a small plate from our leftovers, and then I started to search for the key. I soon found the key, and I tucked it in my pocket. I took the plate, and the key, unlocking the door, and heading down the hallway, to Romelo.

When I walked in, his head was down.

"Romelo.." I whispered.

His head shot up, his eyes barely open.

"Hey baby.." I cooed, approaching him. I set the plate down, and untied his arms. They fell to his sides, and he watched my movements.

"How are you doing, hm?" I caressed his face. He mumbled, and I messed with his hair. Romelo gave me a dopey smiled, hugging me.

"You look gorgeous.." He laughed, "you smell good too.."

I rubbed his back. "Lorenzo gave you some drugs, huh?"

He nodded.

My poor baby..

Romelo looks like he's so sick. He's starting to turn pale, and the gash in his arm looks like it's becoming infected..

"I brought you something to eat, Melo, I know you aren't eating.."

I sat on his leg, and he wrapped his arms around my waist, nuzzling his head into my neck. "What is it?"

"Just some food I made earlier."

Romelo tried to pick up the fork, but dropped in back down. I lifted the fork up, starting to feed him. I didn't mind, it was just like feeding Ramiro. And plus, I liked taking care of him.

"I love you.." He mumbled.

"I love you more," I kissed his cheek, sighing.

I could see the warmth in his eyes, but there was sadness in them too. I knew he was thinking about Ramiro.

"Can I..can I see him..?"

I looked down in my lap, and shook my head. "He's asleep, right now.."

Romelo nodded, and kissed my lips gently. "You should be getting back to bed. I don't want you to be caught by Lorenzo.."

Suddenly, a thought popped into my head.

I didn't have to tie Romelo's arms back. When he got his strength back..he could overpower Lorenzo..

"Good night, Melo," I kissed his forehead, standing up.

"Promise me you'll be back soon..?" Romelo asked, his voice hoarse and tired.

I nodded.

"You'll see me sooner than you'll expect it."


(AN: Aaliyah's got a plan! You think it'll work?)

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