Marriage As Punishment

Under The Trees

CHAPTER 4

That will teach him! Showing up late and inebriated, the nerve! I continue briskly walking away. I'm sure I've left mother and Lady Mary in a state of shock. What poor behavior on my part, but really, can anyone expect any better? James is infuriating. How can one man be so ill mannered? I yank my hat and veil off.
I've met hundreds of common men with more decency in their little finger! Noble man, hardly! Our first meeting! Our first, and he doesn't even try to make a good impression. Does father truly expect me to marry this man? Oh how much easier life would be as a man!
I come to a stop under a large oak tree. I'm breathing fairly hard. I was practically running from him. I lean against the coarse bark, closing my eyes and taking in the earthy scent. I must gain control of myself. Deep breath in, deep breath out. Once I am breathing normally, I open my eyes and look around.

Goodness, I've come so far! The grand old house is just barely the size of my palm! It did not feel as though I had been walking for long. Oh well, some time alone with nature is welcome. I need to think.

Why does James infuriate me so? It hardly makes sense. I've never known the man. Of course, his reputation precedes him, but then again, so does mine. I despise this, just, everything! I despise it all. He is not a great man. One would never call him a leader. Being forced to marry a stranger will certainly cause one to be bitter. I think that is what upsets me the most. I have no idea what this man is like! All I know is that he drinks and gambles. That leads me to believe he may be a cruel man. I just don't understand. I feel as if I'm on the verge of tears. Tears of anger, no doubt. The unfairness of it all makes me want to rebel. I will not go along with this. I will not make this easy. I'll fight him on everything! No matter how small. I must be discreet, though, around his parents and mine. If this does not work out it will be he who ends the engagement. Surly father wouldn't blame me if he wouldn't marry me.

I'm feeling very good now. Full of joy and mischief. Now I just need to keep my calm when he's near by. My mind feels at ease now that I have a plan of action. I can fully enjoy the marvels of nature. Under the shade of these great trees, the air is much cooler. It's just cold enough to make my arms tingle, but not cold enough to return. I turn in place and admire the sound of birds. Everywhere there's life, I feel so insignificant out here. Birds above, insects below. It's so peaceful. I feel that if I stand perfectly still and hold my breath I'll be able to hear the ants colonizing below me. And if I close my eyes I might just feel the heart of Mother Earth beating.

"Waiting for something?"

I jump at the sound and the nearness of a voice. I spin around looking for the source, bumping into James. He catches me an holds me against him.

"Easy now, I didn't mean to frighten you," he chuckles.

I flush at the nonexistent space between us.
"Frighten me?" I pull out of his grasp, "Hardly! I just didn't hear you coming." He laughs again.

"Ah, of course," he smirks.

I raise an eyebrow, "I don't appreciate your sarcasm."

"I could never be sarcastic with you, my dear."

I shake my head. "Why are you even here? Did you follow me?"

"Yes," he replied. I wait for him to continue, but he doesn't.

"Yes, you followed me? Why?" I asked.

"Is it a crime to care about your fiancée? I just wanted to apologize for being late. I had to take care of... some things. I didn't think I would make it in time. But I'm pleased that I did," he said stepping closer.

I took a step back. "Oh right! Your business matter. Did it go well?" I smirked.

He paused, "Uh, y-yes, it went smoothly. Very well. Yes."