Lost Girl ~ CaptainSwan AU (1)

Chapter 2: Tearstained Pillow

Emma's PO.V:

Lying on my bed, my pillow lightly stained with tears, I scowl. I actually let myself develop feelings for someone who couldn't possibly ever feel anything for me. I brought this to myself. How could I be so ridiculously stupid?! I stare at the ceiling in frustration. Since I know Killian doesn't like me, I supposed I'm kind of curious about who he does like...

I get up from my bed and head to the bathroom. I wash my face, hopefully erasing any sign that I'd been crying. Opening the door to my room, I see Killian has been waiting for me all this time. His face softens at my approach.

"Swan," he breathes.

"Hey pirate," I say halfheartedly. "Why don't we talk?" He nods, and I invite him into my room and close the door. We sit on my bed. On my bed. On my bed, right next to my tearstained pillow. I flip it over before he can see anything.

"So," I begin, "this girl you like... what's she like?" I figure if he can describe her, I can figure out who it is he likes.

"Well," he says with a shy smile, "she's absolutely beautiful. She's got golden hair, lovely, bright green eyes. She's smart, talented, kind, sarcastic, and just bloody amazing." He looks up at me and smiles. I almost cry again. I know who he likes. He likes the girl that every boy in the school us foster kids go to likes. He likes Brynn.

Also the girl who has hated and bullied me since the beginning of time.

"Oh. I see. Well... if you really like her, I would ask her out. Take your chances." I give him a pained smile. He may not like me, but that doesn't mean I don't want him to be happy. He smiles back at me.

"Thank you, Swan. And I'm sorry for whatever I did that upset you before. I'm just glad you're okay now."

"I'm fine, really. I just... needed some space, that's all. Good luck with Brynn..." I say softly. With that, I get up and leave the room, a shaky breathe escaping my lips.

Killian's P.O.V:

No no no! She thinks I like that horrible Brynn!! This most definitely is not how it was supposed to go. Not even close. Besides, how could I possibly have feelings for somebody who mistreated somebody as sweet and kind as Emma?

I want to rush after Emma. To hug her, and tell her that I like her, and only her. But instead, I just sit there in shock and digest everything that happened. I look back on our conversation. When she told me I should ask "her" out, she looked so pained. And that smile... it was so week, and forced. Maybe she does have feelings for me. I'm going to take Emma's advice, even if she thinks it's for another girl. I'll tell her as we walk home from school tomorrow.

*   *   *

Emma's P.O.V:

Pulling my lunch out of my lunchbox the next day, I sit with Killian, as usual. As I eat my sandwich, I can feel the awkward tension. Killian may not feel it, but I definitely do. Before I get the chance to break the silence, a boy named Neal from my English class walks up to me.

"Hey Emma." I turn my head and face him.

He's a weird one. Don't get me wrong, he's sweet and all, but this is the fourth year he's been held back. He's way older than he should be for this grade, but I guess he's not a bad guy.

"Hey Neal. What's up?" I can feel Killian's eyes watching me.

"Well, um, you see, I was just wondering if, and of course only if you want to, maybe you'd like to go for some froyo after school today?" he manages.

"Are you asking me out?" I ask, one eyebrow raised.

"Um... well, yeah," he says, blushing. I think for a moment. Killian clearly doesn't have feelings for me, so what's the point in trying to win his heart if it's set on another girl? I suppose I should try to move on...

"Sure Neal, froyo sounds great," I reply with a week smile. Neal grins and walks away.

"You like him?" Killian asks me.

"I don't know. There is someone I like... but I found out that he likes someone else, so I might as well start getting over him."

Killian's face softens. He almost seems disappointed. I wonder why?

"And who was the lucky lad?" he asks, smirking.

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

"Aye, I do. That's why I asked."

"Well," I'm blushing hard now, and I know it. "It was uh... it was yo-" the bell signaling that lunch is over saves me, and I make a point of not wanting to be late for class. I'm so glad I didn't have to tell Killian about the stupid crush I had... have... on him. That would have been embarrassing.

Killian's P.O.V:

I should've just told her when I had the chance. I should've told her yesterday on the bed. Right then and there. And now, she has a date with Neal after school, exactly the time I had planned to tell Emma that I like her. Perfect, just perfect. But when I asked her who she was getting over... it was almost as if she had started to say "you." Me? Does she feel for me? Too late to find out now.

*   *   *

Neal and I have been out a few times over the best two weeks, and he actually isn't so bad. He's a nice enough guy, and he hasn't broken my heart - yet. As I tiptoe over to surprise him at his locker after school, I see something I really don't want to see.

I see Neal, but I also see a girl from my French class. Ruby Lucas. He's flirting with her, and she's standing there in her way too short clothes, twirling her hair. I see Neal step closer and press his lips against Ruby's. She moans into him as he kisses her heard. I step out of my hiding place.

"Neal?" I say, my eyes wet.

"Emma!" he says, pulling away fast. "Look, I can expl-"

"How could you?" I whisper.

"Em-"

"How could you?!" I shout. "I trusted you. What kind of guy says he really likes a girl and then cheats on her?!"

"Emma calm down, we can work this ou-"

"Don't tell me to calm down. And I don't want to wrk this out. How could you?!" I say angrily, small tears leaking out of my eyes. I wipe them away quickly.

"Emma I-" I slap him. Hard.

"Don't. Just... just don't."

More pissed off than heartbroken, I turn on my heal and run home. Back to my room.

Back to my tearstained pillow.