HLHA

I am like Taylor Swift minus the melody

Just another of my blabbering. I have several name references, if you don't know them I suggest you google them for you to understand this rant more.

Before anything else, I'd like to clear myself that I am not the kind of person who gets pissed off easily when being teased, called names or being laughed at due to my flaws especially if I am close to that person. I'd even ride with your joke if I am in the mood and we are close enough.

That being said, I just got pissed off several hours ago because I was called names.

This guy has been calling me the same name days ago. At first, I get the humor. I'm fat, I know. I'm not pretty, I know. I'm not your type, I know. But seriously dude, you don't have to freaking call me Carla Estrada, and then jokingly switch to Carla Abellana when I glare at you just to rub my flaw in my face everytime we meet.

Would you have wanted me to call you Kanye West and then jokingly switch to Zac Efron when you get pissed?

I AM FAT. I am fully aware of that, and I don't need you to compare me to other people just to emphasize it. I love to eat, I don't exercise, I am not attractive but at least I know I'm not fake.

I may look like I don't care when you say it but that doesn't mean I'm not going to write about it.

I'm like Taylor Swift minus the melody.

I'm sure there are tons of guys who do this to other girls. Apparently in this fucked up country (or probably to other countries to), body shape dictates respect.

Let's admit it, the first thing a guy sees in a girl is her body shape, the face only comes next. They won't hit on you if you are fat even if you are beautiful. I, personally have never seen a guy come up to a fat, ugly girl and say "Hey, you are fat and ugly but I know deep down inside you are a very wonderful person so I'm setting your physical features aside and give it a shot". If there are boys like this, may God bless their souls. But please, don't call a girl fat and ugly in her face.

Sometimes it needs a lot of time for a man to get to know us before they fall for us. And that's why we hold on to the saying "Love comes to those who wait".

Guys' first words to a girl would either be "Hey sexy" or "Hey beautiful" because that's what they see. They're like bulls chasing over red lipsticks. They won't look at a girl and immediately know that they have a pleasing personality or they're a wonderful person. No. That only comes later in the relationship. And sometimes, it's that point in the relationship where it breaks.

It's sad to think that a lot of relationships start due to physical attraction and ends up later when they get to know each other more and realize that their personalities don't meet.

Unfortunately boys are all (or more often) for physical attraction.

I respect that. I'm not asking for you boys to change. That's your nature. You tend to get controlled by your hormones, I get that.

But we are girls. We have softer hearts than you have and even if it doesn't show, deep inside we get hurt by your words or your gestures. Not everyone will get your jokes, not everyone will understand your intentions. You won't know that the person your joking with is actually getting hurt deep inside but she chooses to keep it to herself. You won't know that it pisses her off when you flirt with a pretty girl right after you made fun of her. Guys please, stop making fun of girls!!
Seriously, just writing these and imagining it, it's already hurting me.

We get that your preferences in a girl is for her to have a trophy body and a display-type of face (even if she is utterly dumb). And I am praying that you find true love in her. So be happy. Stop bothering yourself in making fun of the girls you don't like especially when you're already seeing that they don't give a fuck.

We are girls and we deserve to be respected no matter what type of body we have or what our status in life is. Everyone deserves to be respected.

This also goes to those girls who are fond of seeking men's attention by degrading themselves. Please, stop. You don't need to cover your entire face with make up, or show 90% of your skin just to find someone who will love you. It's nice to have people get attracted to you, but it's nicer if they are attracted to you and respects you at the same time. Respect yourself before you demand others to respect you.

Be the kind of girl a guy would manly walk up to and introduce himself properly rather than being whistled to like a dog when you pass through.

And for my fellow large sized girls, you know yourself better than any other people. Don't let them destroy you with their words and gestures. Be healthy and be happy. Be who you want to be. Being fat isn't really a sin as long as you're healthy and happy with your life. Fuck what other people say, we don't live for them. And if ever you feel like you're full of these people making fun of you and decide to lose weight and be more attractive do it not for them but for yourself. Never change yourself for other people 

And for this guy who is making fun of me, all I can do now is to pray for you.

I'm not that strong enough to come up to your face and tell you to stop bothering me. I know in the next days you'll continue calling me Carla Estrada as if she's a joke even if she is a very respectable woman. I will just pray for you and for your future.

After all, you are the type of guy who would choose the sexy girl with the red lipstick who needs a calculator in adding 700 and 200 and who apparently is secretly having an affair behind her fiance's back over the fat ugly writer who once upon a time told you of her dreams in life.

I will pray for you and hope that someday you will learn to respect me like how I respect you since I've known you.