Adopted by the Akatsuki

Adopted by the Akatsuki 38

Apparently I wasn't the only one that found Orochimaru's hair tasty. The baby did too. Poor baby didn't have a name. Konan kept putting it off until later and later, and Pein was desperate to get out of this. At some point Pein turnd to drinking to get away from this, but Madra threw away all his rum. Pein had a Jack Sparrow momet and freaked because all his rum was gone.

I spent a lot of time playing with the cute baby. A little too much.

The Akatsuki had to return to thier own cooking skills because I kept forgetting.

Itachi set the kitcen on fire.

Madara used his Mangekyou.

Kisame reduced it to peices of bent metal with his Samehada.

Hidan, well, lets just say it was something your parents don't want you to do.

Pein went SIx Path Sage and they all staked it.

Zetsu ate it then vomited it back up-good God, i'm scarred for life now.

Deidera blew it up.

Sasori tore it apart.

Kakuzu beat the living crap out of it.

Konan gt freaking pissed at them for causing all that chaos, and when Konan gets pissed, it better not be your fault. Everyone blamed Pein. Pein is a retard so he blamed me, but he ended up pointing at slobering baby that I was rocking. Konan slapped him so hard he went through a wall. She turned her attention on me.

"Can I eat this aborable little dumpling?" Thankfully Konan thought I was too cute to kill so I was able to get out of that one alive. I don't know what she thought about the others though.

Pein was so desperate to get away from the baby that he made us all go on vacation, convinced that Konan was going to hire a babysitter.

Konan was not leaving her baby with some random person. We had to take the baby on the roadtrip. Zetsu was the frist one to leave. He just followed, travelling via the trees above our heads-and I hitched a ride on his back. Zetsu was a bouncy Salad Banana. You should have seen the look on his face when he found out that I'd been on his back the whole time.

The baby and me played a lot. Baby learned a lot of new words from Hidan-use your head, its Hidan-and some words from me-Meanie Pein, Zetsu Salad Banana, Sharkie, Weasul, Tasty Hair, Greedy Bastard, Physcopath, Blondie, Kaka-Kabuto, and Mommy. Now he knew everyone's names, aside from mine. Konanan's baby was mean! Meanie baby!

Pein accidently killed the guy that he was going to make sign the peace treaty because he whistled when he saw Konan. No peace treaty for meanie Pein today.

Deidera gave everyone a heart-attack because he made a joke about blowing up the baby. Never mess with a Mommy. Mommy is not nice to meanies who hurt her baby. Lets just say Deidera got a very big boo-boo from Mommy Konan. Never mess with a Mommy. Diedera is an idoit, so not only did he piss off Mommy Konan, but he beat up cute bear cub. Mommy bear was not nice to Deidera. Mommies were never nice to the people who hurt thier kids.

Hidan pissed off a momy cheetah and lets just say this time there was no way to undo the damage. Hidan tried to cover it up but the laides noticed. It was halarious.

Apparently the monkies thought that Orochimaru's hair was something new and fun to play with, so a bunch of monkies started playing with his hair for about an hour before Kabuto showed up and saved Orochimaru.

The freaking chicken came back-AGAIN-and started asking everyone where Uchiah Itachi was. Orochimaru pointed in a random direction. The chicken bowed and left.

There was a girly scream. Itachi came back wearing a blonde curly wig. It did not look well on him. Blonde Itachi was no cool.

Kisame took me fishing. Kisame caught this huge white shark, but hey, I caughtthis really cute froggy! I win!

at some point the dudes had a contest to see who was the best at long distance peeing. Kisame and Hidan were going at it for the win. They both ran out of juice and chugged about a gallon of water each, and then had at it again and let it rip. Lets just say the guy that showed up to sign a treaty did not like being hit with urine. He stalked of swearing in Chicken.

The army of chicken knigts came after Itachi yet again. It was very funny because it was like 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 chickens vs Itachi. Lets just say that we weren't going to go hungry anytime soon.

Kisame taught me how to surf and we fished. Kisame got really mad at me for catching his ittle brother-HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT KISAME HAS SIBLINGS?????!!!!!!-and his little brother tried to eat Itachi, so Itachi got mad at Kisame's little brother, and out of nowhere Sasuke showed up. Lets just say that big brother pawns little brother every time. Itachi was about to kill Sasuke when Orochimaru yelled out the name of Itachi's favorite food. Itachi took off.

Kabuto had broguht my boom box. I WHIP MY HAIR BACK AND FORTH! I WHIP MY HIAR BACK AND FORTH! I WHIP MY HIAR BACK AND FORTH! Sasuke vs Orochimaru's tasty hair? Mr.Tasty Hair pawns.

Kisame fried up some fish, and then he broke down crying because he'd fried up uncle Jason. By that time Kakuzu had eaten cousin Lenny. That fight was brutal.

As if on cue a stripper showed up and asked us for directions. We all pointed in a random direction. The stripper walked away, with Hidan close on her heels. Someone screamed. But it wasn't the stripper, and It wasn't Hidan.

You think that your mom is bad? Well, time to meet Orochimaru's mommy. And here I thought that the son was twisted. Now I know where he got it from. His mom had brought some test subjects from home. It was very creepy to see what she had done to those poor bastards.

Did I forget to mention that Hidan has a little sister?