Adopted by the Akatsuki

Adopted by the Akatsuki 31

(if anything, this thing is at least good for a few laughs so i guess its not going away after all.) since when did so many people even read this far?????? oh well. there's no plot to this thing, i give up. if you read ahead its just going to be what i guess is funny stuff because i don't see the humor to it.

Itachi had fallen asleep and decided to barge into my room now for some reason while the chickens went at it. he set then all on fire and then pulled out what looked like a couple gallons of barbaque sauce and then started eating the chickens.

Kisame showed up and made us all go to the beach.

Itachi was fine with it but he had to finish his chicken first-since when does he like chicken? he nearly killed me the last time i gave him chicken for dinner!-and then we went.

Zetsu ended up eating like fifty girls.......

Hidan.....welll.....thats enough detail right there

and Kakuzu either bought or sold like ten girls

Madara turned into Tobi and traumatized a couple dozen girls with his 'game'

for some reason some crazy lady started singing about art......Sasori killled her.

after that we went back home.

Konan went to the bathroom and started shreiking like a freaking banshee once she was in there. Pein tried-and failed-to break down the door- so he grabbed his treasonous bed and charged at the door with this epic war-cry. don't ask me how the hell it happened but the bed somehow caught on fire and then Pein started screaming. i know i heard wrong because i heard 'i'm in heat!' (do i really need to explain what that means? if you don't know just think of Hidan having fun. this would be fun for him)

Deidera blasted the door open and Konan was COVERED in.....spagettie sauce? how come i didn't get some? Konan you're mean!

Pein just stared at Konan like she was crazy.

during dinner-don't ask how it got here-but this insane german sheperd showed up in the oven, scaring the living hell out of me. i pounced on me and started trying to lick me to death.

"can we keep him?" i asked no one in particular.

"its a she you moron." Black Zetsu said.

"can we keep her?" i gave them puppy dog eyes. "pwease? pwease? pwease? pwease? pwease? pwease? pwitty pwease Pein?"

Pein gave me a death glare.

Konan asked him the same question.

he gave in.

"DOGGIE!"  i yelled.

"you're cleaning up after that thing." Pein told me.

"okie dokie artichokey!" i said

"okie what now?" someone asked as i left the table riding on my new doggy-horse.

Hidan broke into my room.

"EAT HIM BOY!" i yelled.

the dog charged at Hidan and started ripping Hidan to sheds, much to my delight. it was really funny to watch Hidan loose to my cute doggie.

Kakuzu fixed Hidan while i was playing around with my doggie outside, rolling around with it in the mud. Konan was going to come after me for getting so dirty but it was so much fun!

Hidan made the mistake of walking outside and the dog ripped him to shreds again. i buried his head with the doggy bone then lied when they asked me if iknew where Hidan was. they knew i was lying but no one really cared if Hidan was dead or alive.

some random terrorist friend of Deidera's showed up and they started talking about what place to bomb next. they spent a few hours laughing and planning what places to blow up.

three days later i found Godzilla! he lived in a cave behind the base! he made me promise not to tell anyone though.

don't ask me for the details but some guy showed up in my closet that night. thankfully i'd stolen some of Deidera's clay so i blew up the dude.

the next morning Konan took me out for panckes-YUM!-but only after i'd accidentally eaten some more of Mr.Tasty Oreo's hair. (Orochimaru)

the syrup was slimy, warm and stiky. it got all over my face, then i scared the hell out of Deidera with it because he hates syrup for some reason

Pein was downstairs exploring the basement that they had only just recently discovered. this made me woder if the hideout was really his. how did he not know about the basement?

it was really funny because Pein kept tripping all over my stuff. he accidentally let the goat out-i swear i'd been planning on milking it sometime this month-and it went berserk on him.

then some maniac broke through the wall. it was  really hairy dude swinging from what looked like hair. needles to say the guy smashed nto Pein and then Pein started talking in English but the guy only spoke monkey so he threw a few coconuts at Pein.

Kabuto showed up out of nowhere and started teaching the jungle-dude english.

the guy flipped him off and then stole Pein's underwear-why was Pein wearing hot pink underwear with 'princess' writted all over them-and started running around with them.

"AFTER HIM!!!!!!!!!!!" Pein roared.

Pein spent an hour trying to get his underwear back. gee, he's  a geat leader!

some maniac broke our door down and loudly procliamed: "I COME IN RAPE!"

"don't you mean 'i come in peace?" Pein asked

the guy stared at him like he was mad.

for no reason about 50000000000000000 million tons of condoms fell on top of us. if i'm able to get out of this condom sea, i'll kill Hidan!