Destined Path

Chapter Twenty; Across the Sea

The journey couldn't be more contrasting and filled with déjà vu. The last time I travel across the ocean following this path I was so cocky and self-righteous. I was heading to claim what I stupidly thought I could possess. I had been overly excited by war. Stupid and pretentious. It seemed to be years ago, but I wasn't that much of a fool. I wished I had had years with Onyxia, instead I received mere months. As the time passed, and the only view of the world I had was the bleak ongoing horizon, I went over the months leading to our split. So many actions I would change if I could only go back and alter the past.

As much as my heart fell heavy with insistent worry, at the harsh judgement her family must feel for me. Giving her back in such a disregarded fashion. The more time passed, the more I had the hallowing feeling that she must have had. Traveling to some new world where everyone saw you as an enemy and the land was so unfamiliar you couldn't never mistake it for home. I sat closely to my brother, feeling guilty everytime I glanced at him. He should have never been allowed to travel. His long, thin limbs struggled to retain any dwindling heat as we furthered into the winter weather of Scandinavian shores. I was surprised he even made it this far in the journey, we only had a short few days to go. I hoped for enough luck given that, our storages for food and fresh water were thinning quickly as the huddle of men spanned over ten ships ate more regularly like bears preparing for hibernation.

I looked at the setting sun, no for the first time did a churn of loneliness twist inside of me at sleeping without caressing hands. I've been sleeping in an empty bed for half the year now, I couldn't contain the yearning that my solitude was soon ending. If she'll even have me. Sarabii had revealed that she had burnt all of Onyxia's letters in hopes that I'd never know. I had no idea of her mood. If she even wanted me to come. But I made her promise, and she won't go back on her word. My son fidgeted within the warm folds of my cloak. I swallowed hard, could I be leading my son to his death? Surely not, but the fear still lingered. The boy had been good. He hadn't wailed and misbehaved once throughout the entire trip. He was stuck in a rhythm of sleeping, eating and excitedly splashing at the sea water.

The boats gently swayed with the current, as air fluttered into the sails. With my son hugged against my chest and my thin- boned brother huddled opposite me, I felt a shelter of warmth against the icy wind. Both of them settled, sleep coming swiftly enough, yet my eyes remained on the glistening sky as night built and the world grew dark. Brilliant strikes of colour filled the sky, a stunning painting of blues, greens, pinks and purples caressing the pitch black blanketing of stars and formations. It moved in swirls and quick licks of light. It was beautiful and haunting. As lingering as my wife's memory within my mind, as my eyes closed and my mind quieted, I could almost feel her. Her lips on mine. The smell of her hair. Touch of her fingertips.

In the skip of days like a rock being thrown over a lake, I'll see her again for the first time in six months. A pit of disappointment and loss sat heavy in my stomach, this was the third time that I missed out on seeing my own child grow. I've seen my sister's belly fill. I was there when she gave birth, but I didn't get to see Rekker born. I didn't see him raised fully. I will see this child born. I'll beg, plead, Onyxia until she lets me. I've already missed out of six months of her pregnancy. I refuse to miss out on anything else. No matter what our first conversation be, I'll make that clear to her. Very clear.