Fix Me

Chapter 41.

*****

I jumped out of the bathtub stumbling on my legs slightly as he strolled into the room and smiled at me. I grabbed the shampoo, it being the closest thing to me and I just felt like I needed something to protect myself with.

"Really?" he gave a chuckle, "Sorry about this." He twisted the bat in his hands looking mockingly upset.

I only just managed to stumble back hitting the bathtub behind me when he suddenly swung the bat and it smashed into the mirrored cabinet sending pieces of glass shattering everywhere. I let out a scream and squirted the shampoo at him.

He laughed wiping it from his face, with the back of his hand; it had just missed his eyes which I had been aiming for.

"Come on, Sweetheart." He chuckled.

I bent down and reached to grab some glass but cried out when he shoved the bat down on my hand painfully. I tried to pull my hand back but he only pressed down on it harder and twisted it on my knuckles making it feel like he was going to break my hand.

I kicked out at him and my foot hit his shin succeeding in making him stumble before he angrily slammed the bat against my knee. I pushed myself back against the bathtub pulling my legs back, ignoring the pain in my knee because it was somewhat numbed by the panic in my chest.

"Please –" I sobbed, "I-I swear won't say anything!" I didn't sound like me. Everything around me was beginning to look weird because my eyes wouldn't focus, they felt like they were rolling and I just couldn't control them. I was beginning to get really sweaty but I brushed that off figuring that it was my fear.

I shut my eyes trying to focus on my breathing and found myself thinking more about Lyle, Natalie and Damien. For some reason, thoughts about them were calming me, but it wasn't helping with my eyes or sweat.

"Oh, we all know it's a bit late for that with your recent medical records and your brother's adamant accusations." He said.

I didn't even know him. I had seen him a few times when I lived at home, but I had never bothered with my mother or Gerald's friends. I was only around to clean their messes and sometimes serve them.

I wanted it to end because I felt like he was dragging it out, and I was sure it would end as soon as the pills took effect, but part of me felt like I owed it to Damien and Natalie, to everyone – especially Lyle – to at least look like I had put up a fight. Even when I never believed it, he was always sincere about loving me, protecting me and taking care of me. I didn't want him to feel like he had failed. Maybe if I made it look like I fought he would think he had made me want to. Well, he had. I just needed him to know that what he had done was enough.

I bit my lip opening my eyes. I kept my shaking hands balled into fists beside me on the floor. They were shaking so much and I figured it was because I was so scared. I was terrified.

"So... I take it you're done praying?" The guy looked as amused as he sounded.