Alchemy- A Bastille/Dan Smith FanFic

29: Kyle

He had a girlfriend.

He had a girlfriend.

He had a girlfriend and that was fine.

I moved back from Dan. Our legs which had once been touching, now felt wrong. They burned.

He needed to leave.

"Oh." Was all I managed to get out. Oh.   Oh. Oh.

Oh: the sound of my heart breaking just a little bit.

Dan hadn't looked up from the ground. His hands were gripped together, his knee bobbling up and down in the annoying fashion it always was.

"Jenny." He said quietly, making me feel a little ill. I didn't want to hear her name. I didn't want to know anything. "We've been together for 3 months."

He needed to leave. He really needed to leave. I needed to leave. I needed to be alone, to ponder the thoughts and, oh who are we kidding- I needed to cry. I was drunk and I was emotional and if he didn't leave it was going to break down right there and then.

I put a hand to my forehead and blinked at the ground.

"You, you need to leave. I-I can't, you just need to go." The tears prickled my eyes and my vision blurred.  

"Look, Car," I cringed at the sound of my name leaving his mouth. Car, seemed too personal. It felt like an intrusion now. "We should be friends, hang out, like old times."

 I wanted to laugh. We were never friends. There was always an element of attraction, an underlying lust, want, what ever you want to call it. We were never just friends and he knew that, just as bloody well as I did.

"Perhaps." I squeaked, literally squeaked. I could barely form words. 

Dan nodded his head, realizing he was wrong, very wrong. He smiled slightly, though his eyes told it all. He eyes always told it all. He slowly got up and painfully walked to the door. Each step seemed to take an eternity. 

"See you, Carmen." He glanced at me, his eyes meeting my for a brief second before I looked away. "I'm sorry."

 And with that he closed the door, his eyes still burning into my flipping soul.

His stupid blue eyes told a million words; how everything was gone and how he sure as hell knew that. There was no coming back from this. 

I was stupid to think any different.

***

The next days passed slowly with little meaning.  It was crazy and completely infuriating to think about the effect Dan had on me. I mean, I hadn't seen this man in 2 years and now, after a few small encounters, life suddenly was meaningless.

The other annoying thing was, once I had noticed it, I began seeing Bastille everywhere, and I mean everywhere. Somehow, I had blocked it from my vision for the last 2 years, but now, it was practically impossible.

I turned on the radio and Pompeii.

Turned on the the T.v and Pomepii with Dan's eyes burning into me.

Hell, people were posting it on facebook! I couldn't escape.

Our last conversation was playing in a loop on my mind. Jenny.

Stupid Jenny with a stupid name. She probably had a stupid face and stupid hair and stupid voice.

Part of me couldn't help but picture her in my mind. She probably wasn't stupid, she was probably gorgeous. She probably had kind eyes and a wicked smile and made Dan laugh like I used to.