"What's depression like?" He asked.

Mason Finn Stone

I will be kicking off today. The day where all of us, Alex, Matt and me will upload a chapter revolving around our friend Mason, who died six years ago today.

For our own sake we will all dedicate a little chapter to him, because he meant a lot to us. 

My chapter will be about the things I learned from Mason during the time I was given with him. I learned a lot in the 5 years that I knew him. I got to know him when we were both 8 years old, but I think I might have told you guys about that before.

Mason was the kindest kid I'd ever met. I had ever bad experiences with the kids my age and was very anxious to make friends. I was struggling with depression, a shitty house situation and anxiety, so making friends wasn't something I was great at.

For some reason, talking to Mason was the easiest thing on earth. He was calm, always smiling and always joking. He was very grown up for his age, all the way to being 13. I guess we should've seen that as a sign that not everything was alright with him.

I learned from him that you can't let people who aren't worth it waste your time and ruin your mood. I guess he told me things that he wasn't capable of doing himself. He let a lot of people that weren't worth it ruin his mooth and eventually his life.

He taught me not be ashamed of myself, even though I have struggled with that years after his death. Loving myself has always been extremely hard, but it's good to know that he accepted me the way I was. Awkward, anxious and somewhat emotional. 

He taught me that talking to someone can actually help, though after he died I shut down completely again. He knew all my secrets and I just wish I'd known all of his. He was a very good listener, so even when I felt like I didn't wanted to talk, I eventually ended up doing it anyway.

He taught me that doing what people think you can't do, is the best way to revenge your shit situation. I've kept that in mind all the way up to know, even though I have no desire to show my parents what I can do with my life. 

He taught me that friends are the most important thing in the world. That they can brighten your day when you feel that it's never going to be bright ever again. He didn't only teach me that, he did that for me. He brightened a lot of my days when I thought things would never get better again.

He taught me that you don't need to be cool. Don't need to be popular. Don't need to do things that you don't want to do just to have people think that you're awesome. That you don't need to make yourself unhappy for other people's sake. 

Mason was an incrediby smart, incredibly kind and incredibly awesome person. When he died, my whole world became very black all of the sudden and it has taken me a long time to brighten it up a little again.

I'm not going to lie that writing this chapter brings tears to my eyes. I miss him a lot. Every day.

I love you, Mason. I'll always remember you. You would've been 19 at the moment. The same age as me. We should've been graduated together, celebrating free time. Skateboarding, watching shitty horror movies and having late night conversations about things. 

Mason Finn Stone. June 10th 1996 - october 7th 2009.

- Kyran