How To Save A Life: A Louis Tomlinson FanFiction

Chapter 33: Roadside Chatting

Eliza's POV:

I had some plans of what I wanted to do my last few days. My four day bucket list, I guess. Nothing crazy, like 'go to Brazil' or 'skydive'. Most of them were just normal, everyday things. But one... I didn't know how Lou would react when I asked him... Everyday things, sounds stupid, I know. But honestly, when you know you're gonna die, that's what I love the most. Movie night, soccer in the park, dance in the rain... Those were the things I loved about life. The small things that now were the best memories....

"So what exactly are we doing today?" Lou asked as we drove, trying to act like it was a normal day.

"First, look Lou, I don't want you to have to act like everything is okay. Not if you don't want to. You don't have to act strong. I'm okay with dying. I have lived a perfect life. I don't mind dying." I smiled.

All the sudden, Lou slammed the brakes. "What the heck, Lou?" I asked, freaked out. He just stared at me, his eyebrows furrowed. "Lou, there's a car coming, we need to move." I frowned.

Lou pulled over, angrily. "A perfect life? How, Bells? HOW THE HELL HAVE YOU LIVED A FUCKING PERFECT LIFE?!" I flinched. He never cursed. "You're mother was murdered, you were abused, your father committed suicide, you've been raped multiple times, you fucking stuck with me your last few days," He was crying now. "So, tell me, god dammit, how in the world does that add up to a perfect life?"

I frowned even more. "You don't understand. Yeah, it sounds like a lot of crap that I went through. But honestly, I would go through all of that everyday, if it meant that I still got to see you. My last few days, I am 'stuck' with you, which is why my life is perfect. I get to spend my last few days with Louis Tomlinson, the most amazing boy on Earth, the most loving, caring, funniest," I started to cry. "sarcastic, enthusiastic, guy on Earth, the guy who refuses to wear a seatbelt because if you're gonna die, you're gonna die.", who wanted to work on a farm as a boy, who wants a monkey for a pet, who sleep walks, the guy who the guy who said hello in the park to the ugly, unpopular, weird girl, who even offered to have her over for dinner, who sat and talked to her for hours, who stayed even after he heard how messed up her life was, who kissed her in the rain, who ran after her when she cried and ran away, who didn't leave her when she said she was in love, who helped her with school work, who kisses her everytime someone kisses in a movie, who made people think she was actually worth something, who said 'I love you' to the freak, who-" I was sobbing so hard by now, I couldn't speak. "who-" I sobbed again.

I pulled my legs onto my seat, and hugged them to my chest, sobbing. "Who," I tried again, "saved a girl from being abused everyday, who didn't run away after seeing a girl after being raped, who stayed by her side when her father was dead in front of them, who carried her home, who said that he would be her family when she had none, who brought her to London, who helped her make friends, who was going to give up his dream for her, who stayed by her side when she was pregnant, even when the baby might not even be his, who never left her side even when the baby died, who gave her a promise ring to never leave her, and kept that promise even when she had cancer, and was dying, even through everything that was happening, who-" I stopped suddenly at the feeling of lips being pressed against mine.

My lips parted in surprise, and he continued to kiss me. I felt as my whole body relaxed, starting in my face, going through my arms, to my toes, until I was completely relaxed. I kissed back lightly, just  wanting to memorize his kiss, his lips... He climbed over onto my seat, flipping me over onto his lap, his lips never leaving mine. I could taste the mixture of our tears fall to our lips, as they slowly stopped. I pulled back, curling into a ball and snuggling my head into his chest. "I got the chance to meet you, and spend my last days with you... How isn't my life perfect?" I whispered, and he kissed me again.

"I love you, Bells." He whispered in my ear, and my heart fluttered. That was the thing about Louis. Everytime he said that was like the first. My heart would flutter, my stomach turn, and my head got dizzy. I sat in surprise, never able to understand why or how he could possibly love me.

"Say it again." I whispered.

"Elizabella, I love you with all my heart." I smiled, letting the wonderful feeling of feeling important, of feeling loved sink in.

"I love you."

Louis looked into my eyes, and his eyes filled with tears. "It's not fair, Bells. It really isn't. People live until they're 80, some until they're 100. But you, you have 21 years. 21. Why is that fair? What did they do to deserve more time than you? People ruin others' lives, screw things up, make mistakes, and they still live until they're old and gray. And then you, you are perfect, never doing anything wrong, and you get the shortest life of us all. Why is it that the perfect ones always go first? Why is that fair?" He said, a single tear running down his face.

I wiped away his tear, and thought for a moment. Then I stared at him, forcing him to realize the truth in my words. "When I first found out I had cancer, I was upset. Why such a short life? Right after things got better for me? Well then I realized that I served my purpose in life. I helped you follow your  dream, and helped you see what love was. So then, I was wasn't necessarily happy, but I wasn't very upset with my short number of days. Then I realized something else."

"Lou, there are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There's .1, .11, and .11111111111." I smiled, continuing to just add more 1's. " and an infinite collection of others. There's an even larger set of infinite numbers between 0 and 2, or 0 and 100, or 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than others." I said, and Lou just stared at me, unsure of where I was going with this. "Sometimes, I still want more days. I want to freeze time, add more days to my life, to just stay with you. But Boobear," I smiled, wanting to say his nickname at least just once more. "even if I lived a thousand years, I couldn't tell you how grateful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn't trade it for the world, I wouldn't trade it for forever, I wouldn't trade it for anything. You gave me happily ever after and infinity in what may seem like a short time, but to me felt like forever. Thanks to you, I lived a long, happy life full of love, even if techinally I am only 21. So to you, Louis William Tomlinson, I am grateful."

Louis smiled, kissing my cheek, and I laid on his chest, as we stayed in our seemingly short, but everlasting happily ever after. After what seemed a perfect forever, Lou shifted under me, sitting me up.

"So what next?" He asked.

"Lou, did you know that I have a bucket list?" I asked.

"Um, yes... Will it be hard to complete?" He asked, uncertain.

"No, no. But I would really like to do at least half of it..." I batted my eyelashes, jokingly.

"Okay, darlin'." He smiled.

"I have a few important ones that we have to do. So, one, I want to spend a day at the park, playing soccer, and messing around with you, and later the boys. And then in two days, I want to see my own funeral..." I smiled.

Lou looked at me, and I could tell it was taking everything he had not to break into tears...

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A/N: Hay gurl hay!!!! well unless there are guys reading this, which is very unlikely, so anyways, HAY GURL HAY! so sorry these chapters are soooooo short, i had exams last week, this week, and monday, tuesday, and wednesday of next week. Soooooo...... Hope you like what you read!

Also, I have realized the main thing that makes me fall in love with a guy... Okay, so incase you haven't worked this out based on my constant little quotes from books, I am an obsessive reader. I read constantly. TWO RECOMMENDATIONS, Hush Hush and The Darkest Minds. Both are amazingly perfect. Anyways, to the point. In both books, there is a guy who constantly calls the main girls a nickname. Hush Hush he calls her Angel, and The Darkest Minds he calls her Darlin'. It is the cutest thing ever, and I have fallen in love with the book characters. Just felt like sharing...

xxx Love ya!

-Gretchen