missing | gilinsky

35

Jack Gilinsky

Hannah and I sit across from each other at Renzo's Pizza Deli. We've been here for a couple hours, just eating in silence. I can tell the waitress is tired of us but in all honestly I'm not really in a rush to get back to the hotel.

"So, what exactly happened?" I start, taking long sip from my water bottle.

"What do you mean?" Hannah asks, eyebrows furrowed. 

"Like, when he first came into the room, what'd you do?" 

Hannah shrugs, taking the last slice of pizza from the the plate that's in the center of the table. "Nothing. I was in shock I guess." 

I nod and begin kicking at the floor, not knowing what else to say. This is so weird. I didn't expect to see Johnson today, I'm pretty sure none of us expected to. 

I wonder to myself if Nadia and Johnson are still fighting or if they're talking. They're most likely sleeping if anything. It's getting pretty late so I'm sure if they wake up anytime soon they'll be wondering where Hannah and I are.

Truth is, I don't know if I wanna see either Nadia or her brother tonight. Or even tomorrow. I'm in a confusing place right now. 

All this time I was thinking that once I saw Johnson it'd be like old times, we'd click and get close like we used to be. But it wasn't like that when I was  looking at him in the eyes for the first time in what felt like forever, something was different. We've both changed, but he just didn't look like the Johnson I knew. I'm afraid if I see him again that things are just gonna be awkward. There's no fixing that. 

And with Nadia, how am I supposed to know how she's going to feel? How do I act around her not knowing what her and Johnson have talked about? Does he know that I like her? Does Nadia even know that I like her? Does Nadia even like me? Did she even tell Johnson any of this? What if they didn't talk at all and I'm stressing for no reason.

I hate not knowing what to expect, I hate not knowing if things are gonna change. 

Obviously they're gonna change now that Johnson's back in the picture, but I mean how much? What if Nadia doesn't even look in my direction when I get back to the hotel. What if Johnson wants to give me another black eye. 

My black eye - did he even notice it? And the bruise on Nadia's neck, what about that? And Justin! Does he even know what his so called "friend" did to his little sister?

Thinking about all of this makes me mad. I ball my hands up into two fists and try to control my breathing. Johnson has no clue what has been going on here while he was gone, and what makes me even more angry is that I have no clue what has been going on with him while he was gone.

"Jack," Hannah interrupts my mini-rant. 

"What?" I growl, shifting in my seat.

"What's wrong?"

"What do you mean?"

Hannah glares at me, crossing her arms. "Stop playing dumb."

Rolling my eyes I sink deeper into my seat, sucking on my upper lip. "Are you not the least worried about what's going on in that hotel room right now?"

"What would I be worried about?" Hannah shakes her head. 

I don't answer her for a while, I just stare at the pizza she has in her hand. She doesn't get it. I shouldn't have expected her to but for a minute I actually thought she'd say something helpful. 

"Jack, I'm not you ya'know, I don't worry about all the same things you do," she tells me, cocking her head to the side. "Tell me what's up."

"It's stupid."

"It's about Nadia." 

"Wow congrats, you're so smart for figuring that out."

"Don't get smart with me," Hannah scoffs. "I know you get all rude when you're upset but there's no need to be upset in the first place."

"I'm not upset," I lie. I'm a little upset, but not in a sad way if that makes sense. 

"You're seriously so annoying."

"I learned it from you." 

"Shut up and stop being such a pussy, Nadia is still gonna like you despite what her and Johnson are talking about, and I'm one hundred percent sure she hasn't said anything about you guys doing the nasty so no worries."

I have a sudden urge to chuck my water bottle at her face, but I can't help but laugh. "We haven't done the nasty."

"Not yet." Hannah teases. 

I feel my cheeks heating up but I do my best to suppress it. "Whatever."

"You're welcome for making you feel better."

"I guess," I say, about to make another joke, but then I see Hannah tense up. "What's wrong?"

"We have to leave."

"Why?"

"Let's go," she says, her voice stern. Her eyes are focused behind me, the look on her face tells me that she's right. We gotta go. I throw some money down on the table and don't even bother turning around to see what's got her on her feet before telling her okay and leading her out of the restaurant/deli. 

She stays close to me the first couple blocks that we walk, constantly looking over her shoulder. We walk like that for a few minutes until she untenses and starts acting like herself again. I don't ask what made her want to race out of there before she even finished her pizza because I already know it had to do something with Justin. 

Anytime anything has to do with Justin people get antsy and nervous, I don't blame her. I'm glad I didn't turn around to see him, because I know if I did I probably would've lost my cool and attacked him or some shit.

"Are we heading back to the hotel?" I ask, shoving my hands in my pockets. I bite my lip. Please say no, please say no.

"I don't really know where I'm going, I was following you," Hannah admits, stopping in her tracks.

Squeezing my eyes shut I sigh, "right." Hannah has never been to the city before. Who was I to think she'd know where the hell we were or where to go? Looking around I see that we've been walking in the direction of the hotel. I turn to Hannah and crack my knuckles. Do I tell her I don't wanna go back or ask her if she wants to and if she says yes suck it up and show her the way?

"You don't wanna go back do you?" Hannah questions, raising an eyebrow. 

I frown at her. "I don't know."

"Listen, it's either you face them sooner or later and it's your choice, but I know you're not one to run away from your problems."

"I guess you're right."

"I'm always right." Hannah grins, doing a little curtsy. 

"Shut up before you make me change my mind," I say, quickly crossing the street. Hannah follows me, laughing. Hearing someone be happy calms my nerves a bit. Maybe when I walk into the hotel room nothing is going to be different besides the fact that Jack Johnson will be in it. I can only hope for the best. 

______________________

hey again!!! it feels like i haven't updated in forever but here i am again! I'm sorry this chapter was sort of sucky but I'm trying a sort of calm before the storm thing, not that next chapter there's going to be a "storm", but still. 

ANYWAYYY, thanks for reading and don't forget to vote or comment if you'd like. Again, I apologize for not being able to update frequently and for the short chapters but I am trying for you guys just realize that I'm pretty busy with school and sports and such.

Chapter 36 will be up next weekend!! thanks for being patient.

- gilinskyshigh