Save Me

Chapter Twenty One

I sat on my bed staring at the scissors I had grasped in my hands, my knuckles were starting to turn white I was holding it so tightly. I had two options, I could bring the blade down on my skin and feel the sweet relief of blood escaping through the freshly made cut. Or I could put the scissors down, and cry instead. I suppose there was a third choice, I could walk back downstairs and punch Charlie in the face. I could walk straight up to him, raise my right arm, and punch him as hard as I could, square in the jaw. The last option seemed the most tempting, I wont deny that. But the first option seemed the easiest, my immediate release. But the second option was the most practical, I promised myself I would get better again, and bringing that blade down onto my thigh would not be helping. I continued to sit and stare at the scissors, unsure what option I should go with. After much debating I finally decided, and brought the blade down onto my thigh. I cringed at the initial sting from breaking skin, but that and all the other emotions I had slowly faded away, I watched the blood drip down my thigh and onto my red bed sheets. It was like I was in a trance, I felt so much relief watching the blood slowly ooze out of my thigh. I did feel some guilt, I had promised myself that I wouldn't get out of hand again and here I was, bloody leg in the middle of my room feeling very little guilt. I couldn't look anywhere else, only at my thigh and what I had done. I was to in a trance to realize anyone had walked into my bedroom.

"Emma, what on Earth are you doing?" A quiet feminine voice rose from my door way and I looked up to lock eyes with a pair of familiar blue eyes.

"Brittany?" I hesitantly asked, I didn't speak much to my sister. So I was quite shocked to see her in my bedroom. It was then that it dawned on me what situation she had walked in on. "Oh no." I whispered.

Brittany quickly shut my door and hurried over to me. "Emma, what happened?" She quickly assessed the cut on my leg and picked me up bridal style in a matter of seconds.

"Britt what are you doing?" I asked, finally coming out of my daze as she lifted me off my bed. Brittany was a small girl, I had no idea how she was able to pick me up off my bed so easily.    

"Taking care of you. Jesus what do you weigh, five pounds?" She looked down at me disapprovingly, the only time I had ever seen Brittany looking disappointed in me.

"H-how are you lifting me, I weigh more like five hundred." I struggled to get out of Brittany's hold but she only moved me closer to her.

"You've got to be fit to be a cheerleader Em, its not all twists and turns." She rolled her eyes at me, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, which I suppose it was pretty obvious she must have muscles considering she was throwing people in the air all day and catching them.

"Just put me down Britt, I'll be fine." I was starting to feel tired and just wanted to deal with the mess I had made by myself.

"I don't think so," She simply replied, "You've cut pretty deep and I doubt you're going to know how to take care of this."

"Like you'll know any better." I laughed.

"What the hell do you think I've been learning in my Nursing courses? How to put on a band aid?"

I looked up at Brittany shocked, "Did you say nursing courses?"

"Yea, what did you think I was at school for?" She questioned me back. I didn't answer at first as she put me down on my washroom toilet. "Did you think I was there just to do cheerleading?"

I looked down ashamed, my sister was studying to be a nurse and I didn't even know. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine," She said waving it off with her hand, "Let's take care of your leg right now, okay?"