Never Gonna Forget- Paul Lahote Love Story (Under Revision)

Chapter.27-A step on Memory Lane

Ch. 27- A step on memory lane

As I shielded my sky-blue eyes from the blinding light with one of my slightly tanned hands, I notice that the light is fading away and with it, my inner demon. As he disappears from my sight, I can't help but to ponder over our previous conversation. Was he right about everything? Am I really naive about everything that has been going on around me? As I reflect back on the words spoken earlier to me by my inner demon, my heart feels a pang of pain from the words that he said.

Is there pain really buried deep within me, at the very core of my emotions? Am I really just keeping the agony and the all the negative emotions that I've ever felt bottled up inside, tucked away and hidden away, because I don't want reality to become another dream that will turn into a death threatening nightmare? Is the pain really worth suffer in, or a better question is, are they all worth suffering for all over again? As I think of my past with everyone, I feel conflicted with the mixed feelings that go hand-in-hand with my memories; some positive emotions and others are negative. Everyone, including the Cullens and Bella, have caused me pain one way or another, but at the same time, they have given me so much happiness and love.

I remember the very first time that I met the Cullens and Bella. It was after my mother's death and after I had first shifted into my wolf form; it was also before everything else happened.

Flashback:

SLAP!

The sound of my father hitting me across my cheek once again echoes throughout the room; the pin and needle-like sensation on my flesh greeting my cheek as if it was a familiar friend. The rough skinned hands, that were used to hit me across my face, shove my shoulders backwards, causing me to lose my balance and fall to the cold, smooth floor harshly. The shadow of my father looms over me, ready to pounce at me if I so much as make a small noise of pain. I bite my lower lip hard, causing crimson blood to rise to the surface of my lip, stopping any noise from crawling out of my throat and slipping out of my mouth. My body curls itself into the fetal position, as if trying to shield myself from another on going attack, but I know that I would continue to feel the soul clenching agony, whether it was physical or not.

Before my body can finish going into the fetal position, a sharp breath-taking pain shoots through my stomach, hitting my rib cage and then spikes up my spine. My breath catches in my throat and I bite back an ear piercing scream. I gasp for air as I notice that my abuser had kicked me in the stomach; possibly damaging some of my ribs and spine in the process. I've gotten used to the abuse now and I'm surprised that the neighbours hadn't heard my screams ages ago, but then again, my house was far enough out of ear shot for anyone to hear my screams, but close enough that my father and I could walk into the reservation. After my father kicks me, he walks away from me, muttering under his breath about how useless and worthless I am.

The front door opens and then slams shut, causing me to flinch from the noise. I hear the sound of my father's feet fading away and I let out a breath of relief that I had been holding. A groan of pain leaves my chapped lips as I slowly coax my body into a sitting position. Then step by step, I gather my strength and stand up, placing a hand on the wall closest to me; to stabilize myself. Once I am completely sure that I can stand on my own, I let go of the wall, panting as I both catch my breath and try to calm my racing heart beat.

I collect my thoughts and then make my way to the front door. I slip my shoes on my feet and then slowly open the front door; cautiously looking outside and not seeing my father within my eye sight. I walk out my front door and shut it quietly behind me. I turn my body away from the reservation and towards the small town known as Forks. I start my long walk towards Forks; my entire body protesting against me every step that I take.