Broken, Flawed & Living (Discontinued)

Chapter Eighteen

Oh, sweet lovely Winter Brea. Why can't thy beautiful season take me out of school already?

The fourth day in December marked the first arrival of winter yesterday, where the crystalized white flakes sprinkled down from dark, clustered clouds. Filling the roads u high in inches and sweeping a cold, wet kiss on our backs and cars and everywhere else we turned. So fast and quick we had adjusted to the immediate change in seasons.

Mostly everyone in the dorms giddied themselves up over the three weeks of doing nothing but catching up on sleep and real, nice homemade meals instead of ramen noodles and oven-ready frozen foods. And some ice cream replacing the late nights of coffee induced adrenaline – or hot chocolate for those non-coffee lovers.

The realness of the struggle reached those who placed limits on their bank accounts, especially ones who weren't working. Especially if you needed internet in your rooms and it wasn't cheap.

Often times I heard the soft crackling of the roof, the swift, subtle whistle of the wind and whenever I opened my door, a small breeze of winter chilled the room. Leone was lucky, being out and about and away from everything else here. Sometimes I looked down on my phone, knowing his contact information was still listed and I go through a debate whether or not to hit the dial button. Or send some texts wondering how he was doing and where he was at – just for curiosity's sake.

Heard he got his dream job, working on the weekends and training on the weekdays. Must be pretty cool for him and I was proud, not going to lie. Glad he occupied himself with something other than me and my relationship, a much healthier way of living. If I'm being honest, I kind of missed his little antics.

Without him here, it got lonelier. No creeping eyes, no small talk. Just me in the solitary confinement of my room where his bed laid untouched and cleaned since he last came. Tori distracted herself with her projects, Levy took the first week of December off, visiting Canada for unknown reasons and Chris drained himself with late night group chats on his assignments. Chance, on the other hand, couldn't make time either. Like now, practicing in the indoor football field Henrick had and as usual, he was pissed about it.

But my mind dwelled little on my loneliness and swayed more focus on the two assignments I began writing up before the break, leaving last minute not an option anymore.

As I continued typing, the sores in my fingers beginning to pain me, an angered Chance garnered my attention when he barged through the door and slammed it thereafter, the reverberating noise breaking my concentration. Sill outfitted in his attire, rather the pants and just a muscle tank top, he slouched down on my bed. With closed eyes and an arm over his head, hr groaned out loud. "Fuck football. Fuck school. Fuck everything."

My man, strung by stress and how the little things picked at his patience. Worn down by football. I wanted to do something, like I've tried doing before but these assignments for two different classes were of more importance. And so I decided not to bother the solitude I let him rest in.

A good night's rest was what he needed and he did it quite often here. Was what his patience desired because anger beaten it to a pulp by now. How much more could he take? How much more could I do?

"Am I being an ass about this?" he asked, amidst the silence. Soft and vulnerable.

As my fingers continued aching, I tried balancing my attention. "I don't know so."

"Like, who thought it was a good idea for a College to have an indoor field? Huh? We can't get a break through winter?" But not his voice picked up strength and anger, showing me how it hit a rising boil. I hadn't realized till now when his warm breath grazed the back of my neck, a shiver running through me. He was behind me, hands gently clenching the shoulders of the chair and his face eased up beside mine, cheek on cheek. "What are you doing anyway?" He more like sighed out his words.