happiness begins [joe jonas]

34

When Joe finally found the strength to go back inside, his head was buzzing, and his eyes burned. He kept his hand in Emmie's the entire time, refusing to let go. He was embarrassed from running out the way he did, but he also didn't want to return to the same conversation. His hands were still trembling, the wind wrapped around him, making him shiver. He tried to break away from his thoughts, but it was useless. No matter how hard he tried, all he could think about was Nick.

Seeing him again, as they entered the lounge, made him stop in his tracks. It was obvious that Joe looked shaken up. His eyes were still red, and there was no doubt that his skin was puffy too. He took one glance at his little brother, before staring at the floor, shame flooding through him.

Emmie gave his hand a reassuring squeeze, letting him know that she was still there for him. But Joe was still broken inside, and being surrounded by everyone didn't help. He shook his head, quickly slipping his hand away from hers, rushing out of the room once more, this time heading up the stairs.

Emmie watched him leave, but chose to give him space. He needed time to himself, to be able to think everything through. She sank down onto the couch, Dani quickly appearing by her side.

"Kev told me." She spoke, her voice quiet, but loud enough for her to hear. She placed a hand on Emmie's knee, smiling at her.

"He's not ready." Emmie shook her head, watching as Dani nodded.

"We know.." She agreed, "I've told the boys to give him time. He'll come round eventually."

Emmie glanced over to where Kevin and Nick sat opposite, unsure what to do next. Kevin ran a stressed hand through his hair, whereas Nick just looked guilty. She felt bad, knowing that he didn't mean to cause a problem. Joe was just emotionally exhausted, and didn't have an outlet.

"It's not your fault." Emmie spoke, trying to reassure him, but Nick didn't seem convinced. He smiled weakly, but didn't look certain.

"Maybe you guys should stay here tonight." Dani caught her attention again. "Give him some time to rest? It might do him some good."

Emmie nodded, knowing that Joe was in no fit state to drive home, especially at this time of night. And she knew he wouldn't want to be alone either.

She excused herself again, wandering up the stairs to find him. She searched the hall, until she came across the spare bedroom, where he lie sprawled out across the middle of the bed, staring up at the ceiling. It was silent, neither of them saying a word.

Joe looked tired, his eyes heavy, as if he could pass out at any moment. His face was pale, any colour completely washed from his skin. Emmie seated herself on the edge of the bed, watching as he blinked slowly, but his gaze didn't shift from the ceiling.

"I'm a mess." He murmured, his voice low. He closed his eyes for a moment, letting out a sigh, before finally looked over at her.

"No.." She told him, "No, you're not. You've just got feelings, and they're valid."

Joe gave her a weak smile, stretching his arms out to pull her into a hug. Emmie crawled across the bed, settling into his arms, resting her head on his chest. He traced his fingers up and down her sleeve, looking back up. Emmie smiled to herself, feeling at ease in his grasp.

"I've got some messed up feelings." Joe continued, a low chuckle at the back of his throat, Emmie feeling the vibrations against his chest. She looked up him, giving him a look which made him stop. She hated the way he spoke down on himself.

"Except you." He corrected, "My feelings for you are real."

She shook her head with a smile, lying back down as she reached out for his hand. She fumbled with his ring, feeling the cold metal against his skin.