doctor, why so cold?

23

Harry returned from each therapy session in completely different state. He had been to eight sessions already. His psychologist decided it would be the best for Harry to go to therapy two times a week at first. She also wanted Harry to see a psychiatrist because she knew his problems weren't just mild.

Harry hadn't done it yet. He hadn't said it aloud, but he didn't want to take pills to be "okay". He knew that those pills are making you okay in a fake way... or that was what he thought at least.

He was slowly getting better. He could feel it and he believed he could make it without any pills.

"So I told him that he should have told me about it earlier, you know?" Louis was telling Harry about something Liam did. Harry was good at listening and giving advices even. You can always help others well, but not yourself.

Louis had a long day which Harry realized thanks to all of those things that had happened. They sat down on their bed, Louis still proceeding to talk about the Liam situation.

"I mean I am his friend right so-" Harry moved closer towards him on top of the bed, kissing his lips.
The kiss got heated soon... and Louis' hands grabbed onto Harry's slim waist. He never did more than that. He didn't want to make Harry uncomfortable, but the younger one had a different glimpse in his eyes that evening.

Once they pulled away, he grabbed Louis' left hand and placed it on his thigh. Louis swallowed the lump in his throat. He felt nervous, like a teenager who was about to have sex for the first time.

Louis slided his hand up and down Harry's thigh, making it on his inner thigh.

The blue eyed one couldn't breathe. He felt lightheaded.
Louis looked Harry in the eyes, but the boy didn't say he minded it yet.
And so the older one united their lips in another passionate kiss. He cupped Harry's cheek with one hand and kept sliding his other hand up and down Harry's inner thigh.
The younger one panted when Louis pulled away.

Louis was unsure about what to do, he was unsure what Harry wanted.
"Can I touch you love?" Louis asked.
Harry nodded, but that wasn't enough for the older one.
"I need words for this Harry." Harry opened his mouth, forgetting how to talk.
"Touch me." Louis' fingers brushed against Harry's bulge, his hand moving on top of his boxers. He squeezed Harry through the fabric, feeling that he was hardening quickly.

Louis' hand then slipped into Harry's boxers.

The blue eyed man stroked him gently, wanting Harry to relax and enjoy the pleasure.
Harry felt good. He didn't feel scared and he didn't feel any pain. It was alright so far.

Louis licked his palm before he returned to making Harry feel good.

The younger one didn't let one moan escape his mouth which Louis was kinda sad about.
"You can moan love. You can moan all you want. I like to hear you." he pressed a soft peck to his cheek.
"I-" Harry's breathing quickened.
"You like it baby?" Harry's dick twitched at the nickname.

"Yes." Harry nodded, his eyebrows scrunching up. He bit his lip, feeling that he was already close.

"Louis-" Harry wanted to tell him he was almost there.
"Come when you are ready love." Louis placed his other hand on Harry's right thigh, rubbing up and down on the inside of it.

Soon enough Harry came into Louis' hand.
"L-Louis." he panted. His lips were swollen and his underwear all sticky.
Louis brought his dirty hand out, getting up to find the cleansing tissues that he had somewhere.

Once he found them he returned back to Harry.
"All good?" he asked.
"Y-yeah." Harry nodded.

Harry attacked Louis' lips again, feeling like kissing him forever.

"What about you?" Harry asked sheepishly when they pulled away.
He noticed that Louis had quite a tent on his own. He knew he should take care of it.
"I am good." Louis wanted to shrug it off.
He would love Harry to help him out, but he knew that this alone was a lot. They hadn't done anything sexual in a long time. It felt like it was too soon.

"I want to help you."
Louis stared at Harry for a while before he decided to try as well as the younger one.
"If you change your mind, you tell me, yeah?" Harry nodded at first but then he remembered what Louis had said earlier.
"Yes Louis." with that Louis took his boxers down to his thighs and sat against the headboard.

Harry plopped down on Louis' thighs, reaching out to wrap his hand around Louis' length.

Suddenly the dark backstreet was in front of his eyes. He was there again for a split of second, but he managed to shrug it off. This was different. This was his Louis. Louis would never hurt him like that guy did, he would never force him into those things.

Harry gave Louis a hand job just as good as he used to do.

Louis panted as he came into Harry's hand.
The boy got up to clean himself as well and throw the tissue into a bin.
After that Harry sat down on the edge of the bed. Louis sat next to him.
"All good?" Louis asked.
"Yeah, I am fine." Harry smiled forcefully.
"I am just tired. I need to take a shower." Harry got up.
"Alright." Louis grabbed Harry's hands before he could leave. Harry leaned down and gave Louis one last kiss.

The younger one got in the shower, seeing all those fading scars on his wrists and thighs.
Thes were turning brown quickly. He let the hot droplets hit his skin as he thought about life all over. Will it be like this forever? Will he just feel this shitty for the rest of his life? He was trying, sure... but it still wasn't really that better. He wanted to be okay or just not to be at all...

Harry felt bad once again and he was tired of that shit. He didn't want Louis to see him like that anymore. The last thing he wanted to be was too much.

There was a knock on the door.
"Harry?" Harry looked at the door in panic.
"Yeah?"
"I brought you fresh clothes. I think you forgot to take them in."
"Yeah, thank you." he checked the bathroom to see that he really had forgotten.
"Can I come in?"
"Yeah." Harry stopped the shower and took the towel in order to wrap himself in it.
Louis came in just as he stepped out of there.

The older one put the pile of clothes on the only cabinet that was there.
"Is that your Reebok jumper?" Harry asked.
"Might be." Louis shrugged.
"You like your intern wearing your clothes, doctor?" Harry smirked at him.
Louis stepped closer towards the younger one.
"I definitely do." he kissed his cheek lightly.

After that Louis turned around and left Harry on his own, so he could dress in peace.

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A/N
Hi everyone. I am posting another chapter. I don't really know what to write here today. Just that being happy and upset at the same time is a weird feeling.
I'm recovering from the surgery right now. How are you doing?

Take care x T