doctor, why so cold?

19

Angel by the wings - Sia

Louis walked through the hallways of the psych ward until he found the right door.
He knocked before stepping in.

"Hey." Harry was just sitting on his bed.
"Hey." he looked up, quite surprised to see Louis there.
"I didn't think you would really come visit." Harry said truthfully.
Louis chuckled and sat down next to Harry.
"Well, I am here. Surprise." Louis glanced at the younger one who was just kicking his legs in the air. He was nervous for some reason.

"Will they let you go home soon?"
"That depends." Harry kept staring down on the floor.
"I got a contact for a therapist that could be the right one to help me. That's what the doctor said." Louis kept looking at the younger one's legs that kept swinging in the air.
"Will you go there?" Harry sighed.
"I am just asking. It's your decision to make. I am sorry I pushed you so much." Harry's corners raised into a slight smile.
"I think I am gonna go. You know, your constant bugging for me to go made me wanna do the entire opposite." Harry admitted.
"I am really sorry, Harry. I won't do it again." Harry looked to the side, staring at Louis' face. Louis sensed the stare so he looked up at Harry as well, their gazes meeting.

"What do you do here all day?" Louis decided to keep the conversation going.
"Not really much you can do here." Harry stared directly into Louis' ocean blue eyes.
"Louis?" Harry whispered quietly.
"Yes?" Louis felt his heart skip a beat.
"Do you really care that much? Or is it just- I don't know... guilt that makes you do this?" Louis looked away as he sighed.
"Harry, I know I acted like a dickhead. I was aware of your trauma but my brain didn't let me see the rest. I was blind. I thought you just had enough of me." Harry didn't know what to say. He knew that he made Louis leave with how he had behaved, but he was still sad he had just left him like that. He was fucked up.

"Well... I should probably get going." Louis stood up, feeling like he should leave.
"Alright."
"I'll come around tomorrow?" Louis said it as a question since he wasnt sure if Harry wanted to keep in touch.
Harry only nodded.

Louis did as he said. He visited Harry everyday during the ward's visiting hours. He also made sure to drop him some clothes the next time.
He came around the fifth time when Harry told him he was finally leaving.

"They will come have a chat a bit later. I'll sign the papers and I can go." Harry was sitting on the bed, dressed in Louis' hoodie.
"Okay, that's good." Louis was glad he could go, but it also unlocked a new worry inside him.

The doctor came around an hour later to check on Harry for the last time. Louis had to wait in the hallway for him. When they were done, the doctor walked out first. Harry followed just couple minutes later.

"Do you want me to take you somewhere?"
"Will you take me home?" Harry asked. Louis didn't expect that, but he nodded. Honestly what else should Harry ask him for?
"The door were repaired while I was gone apparently. I could finally read my texts." Harry showed Louis the gadget he was holding in his hand.
"That's good." Louis tried to smile, but he couldn't really.

The ride over to Harry's was mostly silent. They didn't know what to say. Louis found a spot where to park his car, right in front of the house of flats. They both got out of the vehicle.

As they climbed the stairs, Harry began to feel more and more anxious. When they stood in front of the door Harry's body began to tremble. He unlocked the door and stepped in.

He immediately thought about how bad the bathroom was gonna look. He wasn't sure if he was ready to step in there.

"Harry?" the younger one turned around.
"Are you feeling alright? It seems like you are shaking." Louis frowned.
"It's- I am fine." Harry walked further and Louis only followed.
He didn't want to leave Harry alone yet.
Harry pushed the door to the bathroom open while holding his breath. He switched on the light and stepped inside.

Surprisingly, all he was met with was a clean bathroom. He switched the light off and walked out of the bathroom. He noticed Louis was standing in the doorframe.
"Y-you cleaned it up?" Harry stuttered.
Louis only nodded.
Harry walked up to him fast at first. When he was too close, he slowed down and hesitantly made the few last steps.
He opened his arms and wrapped them around Louis. Louis wrapped his own around Harry securely.

Harry began to cry softly in his hold.
"Thank you. I- wanna thank you for everything you did for me in the last week. Thank you." Harry sobbed. Louis rubbed up and down his back.
"It's okay. No need to thank me, love." hearing that made Harry only cry more.
His whole body shook as he sobbed loudly.

Louis could feel tears fill his eyes.
"I'm sorry. I am so sorry." Harry carried on crying. Louis knew he was overwhelmed.

They stood there for a while, just holding each other close.
Louis didn't want to leave Harry on his own, but asking him if he wanted to go with him didn't seem right in that moment.
"Louis-" Harry pulled away, thinking of how to say what he needed to let out.
"Don't leave me alone please. I can't be alone." Louis brought his hands up, wiping Harry's tears away.
"Do you want to come with me? You can stay for as long as you want to." Harry nodded vehemently before wrapping himself around Louis once more.