𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐃 | 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐢

20

friday
september 5
janae

already my day wasn't going well. i didn't want to go to work today because i felt i was too sick for it. but i need that money

yesterday i went to sleep with a sore throat and a bad cough and a raging headache. and it hasn't got better.

but of course with my haitian parents i'd still be going to school. i forced myself up and walked into the bathroom.

i took my wig out and washed my hair like two days ago. right now it was just in a v part slick back. i kept it wrapped and in my bonnet because i refused to let it go bad before the week ended so i could do a protective style again

i was thinking braids with curled ends and some pink. i love pink it was my favorite color and i always looked cute with pink hair so why not?

mom stopped caring about color and shit after sophomore. i kinda let myself go then and i got beat a lot but it brought me to freedom so fuck it i don't regret it.

i coughed a rona cough before getting my phone to play some music. scrolling through my playlist freely since sergio is paying for my spotify premium, i picked location by playboi carti.

"you cannot hop in my car
bentley coupe riding with stars
i keep a glock like a cop
she give the top in the drop
yeah

diamonds, they wet on my arms
tats on my neck and my arms
tats on my neck and my arms
diamonds, they wet on my arms
tats on my neck and my arms
diamonds, they wet on my arms
tats on my neck and my arms

uh, ooh
in this bitch going crazy
i whip this shit like a baby
i fuck your bitch, she my baby
i treat your bitch like my lady," i rapped as put more gel in my hair so it can slick down.

i refused to go to school crazy like how i did in middle school, sixth grade. mom didn't let me touch my hair because of my hair pattern , which was looser than everybody else's in my moms family side so she gave it all her attention.

she put all these remedies and shit so it can grow.
she didn't let me touch it. at all. i couldn't do anything but untangle it when she put it in puffs and then i'd get in trouble if i shedded too much hair.

i didn't even get to wear weave until eigth grade.

in sophomore, my rebel year i cut my hair because i knew mom had an attachment to it. it went from a bit shorter than mid back to my shoulders.

not much but hell yeah i got my ass tore up for that shit. i even stayed at nadia's house the whole week after i did it cause it was spring break. and yeah i got beat for that too.

like dat by kodak played as i fixed my edges.

dad said he thought edges were too blackish. for some reason, my black haitian parents hated everything associated with black people. rap, aave, and much more.

i mean mom doesn't mind the edges, she even likes it. but i swear dad hates it. sometimes he doesn't even notice but other times he be giving me side eyes.

mom and dad both don't equally don't like rap.

dad didn't like when i wore braids for the first time.

it makes me laugh sometimes because they're actually so racist to black people when they black themselves.

12:21
sergio

i refused to go school to for the sole reason marco my older brother called me and told me stay home.

marco never wants me out of school, he the one who forced me to wake up every morning.