Collie

XXIV

Bennie

"Do you see why I didn't want you fucking with this stuff?" Mama spat.

She saw the video we uploaded and came straight to my house and demanded that Harper lift up her shirt. I've never seen my girlfriend move so fast.

"We just wanted to test the equipment out." I reason.

"Bennie."

Uh oh. She called me by my name.

"You really don't want to be fucking with this stuff. Harper has gotten hurt. It could've been worse."

She's stressed, I can see that. I feel bad, she's got so much going on all the time and I've just added to it.

"I'm sorry, Mama." I mumbled.

She sat down on my couch after pacing my floors for twenty minutes straight. She sat down and cried.

"Do you know who Joel is- was?" Mom asked.

"No. Why?" I reply.

"The sick man that tried to weasle his way back into the family after putting your Mama through torture. He was not a good person. He was disgusting. He went to prison and was killed because of what he'd done." Mom explained.

Now, I had some idea of my parents childhood. Although, they have made it clear that it's behind them and they don't want to dwell on it. But I had never heard of Joel. His name didn't ring a bell at all.

"What relation did Joel have?" I reluctantly ask.

"Auntie Husky's twin brother."

I had met Auntie Husky when I was six. She lived out of state and was visiting for like, some family gathering at Mamgu's, Mama's mother, house to meet her new partner, Paul. I remember just staring  at her and she stared at me before she'd said,"She looks like Kate." At that point, my parents hadn't come through the door as they were bringing Billie and Danny's things in as they required half of their bedrooms everywhere they went.

But I never knew she had a twin.

"Really? How come I didn't know?"

"Why would we want to tell you about one of the fucking people who hurt me in childhood?" Mama asked, clearly frustrated.

"I'm so sorry, Mama."

"Just leave it, Bennie." Mom sighed, "Let her feel her emotions. She could never be angry at you. She's not angry with you. She's angry at Joel. Okay? It's not your fault. How were you to know?"

I hug my Mom tightly. "I love you, Mom."

"I love you, too, Collie. Give your Mama a cwtch too." Mom jutted her chin towards her wife. I let her go and immediately embraced my sobbing mother. She hugged me back and I kissed her head, and Harper hugged her in the other side.

"I know you didn't know, kiddo. I'm sorry, its just, I hate him and didn't think you'd have to deal with him. But obviously he found you when you were there."

"I'm sorry, Mama."

"It's not your fault. But uh... That Carol... girl. She was always there for me... When I hid. She was the one who was always there. I'm glad you found that out at least."

"Yeah."