Making up for lost time ~Hat Films Fan Fiction~

Chapter 15 - Suffering For A Good Cause

Smith sat tense in the taxi back. There's no way he could do what Trott's father, Michael, had said. But what could he do? Chris' dad, who own probably half of Texas, had demand that Alex should dump, ditch and forget Chris. But Smith wasn't allowed to give a reason, or if he was to give a reason, it can not be traced back to Michael. Sat in the same places they did on the way, Alex was holding Chris' hand in a very tight fist, slowly stroking his thumb over Trott's. He couldn't bare to look at Chris but at the same time wanted to relish the time he had left with him. Smith could feel Trott's worried and curious gaze fixated on him, it was saddening but Alex had to play the bad guy now, at least try and get Trott to break up with him first. It would probably help if you let go of his hand. Cussing himself for thinking that but also not even letting go, Smith struggled with the internal battle, occasionally flinching when Chris called his name. "Smith, are you sure you're o-"
"I'm fine," Alex grunted, cutting Trott short. He felt a pang of guilt when he took a quick glance of Chris' hurt expression, but forcefully reminded himself it was for the best. Reluctantly Smith wrenched his hand off of Trott's and pretended to check his phone so it wouldn't seem so obvious he was avoiding him. Unfortunately it was unsuccessful and Chris' face broke even more. Trott gave one last sad glance at Alex whilst he 'looked' at his phone, then shuffled closer to the car door, turning his attention to the city outside. It hurt, and not just a quick stab to the heart hurt, there hang an excruciating ache in Alex's chest. Trying his best to reason with himself, Smith told himself over and over again that this pain now, would be nothing on what would happen if he refused to break off their relationship. At least if he broke it off earlier, Chris could get use to not having Alex around and when the time comes for Smith to move out, it wouldn't hurt Trott. Although this was all rather selfish, because if he failed to split up with Chris in a month, Chris would be the one who would have to leave. Well more be taken away. As his mind fogged over with the stress and despair he felt, Alex missed out on a conversation going on about where they would go tomorrow, so instead nodded when conversation was aimed at him. Fiddling with the faded green bracelet, Smith blocked everyone out.

Trott sat alone, on the edge of his bed, eyes lost and glazed as they fixated on the void of nothingness. A sad and heavy sigh fell from his lips. He laid back onto his bed, arms out stretched but feet still on the ground. Replays of today blurred in his mind causing a crushing weight to reside in his chest. A whimper escaped as the fear of loss and need encapsulated him. When he and his boyfriend had parted to go to their rooms, there was just nothing. They rode the elevator in silence, not touching or holding hands, sometimes it felt like they weren't even in the same world. Then when Chris told Alex he loved him, there was nothing. Nothing but pity seemed to emit from Smith. What had he done wrong now? Trott curled into himself, not bothering to take off his dirty converse, and felt his eyes water. Refusing to cry he grit his teeth instead focusing on work or where they were going to go tomorrow. Just when all the dangerous and self worthless thoughts had simmered down, a name flashed up on the screen of Chris' iPhone, and his heart skipped a beat.

'Coming down the balcony. Be there in a bit x'

Panicking slightly, Trott averted his attention to the doors on his left hand side. Shooting to stand up on his feet, Trott did his best to compose himself, dashing to his suitcase to take an aspirin in hopes of his hurting to stop. A light tap on the glass startled Chris and the recognisable face of Smith appeared the other side. Hope and dread drowned Trott and before he realised it he was shaking. Moving to open the door, Chris saw a glimpse of himself and hated it, ill coloured and panicked eyes, no wonder smith started to hate me. When he finally let Alex in, they greeted each other with awkward smiles and waves, a drastic change from their usual beams and loving embraces. "Chris, I-I think we need to have a chat about, something," Alex's words tumbled out in desperation. Trott's mouth hang open and his eyes searched desperately to find something, anything, in Smith's face.

It hurt. It rang like hell in Alex's ears. He fidgeted and shook, feeling the pit of his stomach drop. Chris stared back, mirroring the worried and pained expression that Alex wore. "Trott, I-" Smith began, feeling sick as the words clogged his throat. Don't make that face, this is for you. Then Chris just smiled. It was piercing and depressing. And the sight hurt more than the thought of him leaving, it hurt more to see Trott not understand but still accept it, it hurt because neither of them wanted this. But it had to be done. Smith, selfishly, couldn't just loose him again.
"Trott, I'm so sorry,"

A/N: Good Day! I was wondering wether to do the next chapter, straight after this happens or to do a bit of a skip ahead to the morning after? Any suggestions? Oh well hope it was ok, as per usual thank you all for your support!!